This is the easiest (though not necessarily the fastest) way to upgrade yourself…
Let me know what you think… please leave a comment below (and please like my Facebook page here)
This is the easiest (though not necessarily the fastest) way to upgrade yourself…
Let me know what you think… please leave a comment below (and please like my Facebook page here)
Norman Hallett
Love your new breakout personality, Jeff! I’ve known you as a pretty shy guy, really… and this new ‘stretching’ you’re doing… just fabulous. You smiled through this whole little presentation… made ME smile. Keep letting it out, my friend!
Norman
Anthony Ford
I like the part of upgrade yourself I find that is true with people you meet, on the way. It is not all about what I’ve it is how true you’re to
yourself and people can tell that about people. it doesn’t matter what someone think of me, but it what I think of them.
Byron
How old is this saying…”Birds of a feather ‘……yes I guess because their is a degree of comfortableness (is that a word?) It is so natural.
However, if you are ‘growing’ you will find yourself adding to your friends because you are adding knowledge, expanding your awareness,
and redefining your priories . Thanks for the reminder. Blessings-
Mackenzie Andersen
I like the way Jeff Walker presents his ideas, which is that he seems so personable and to be talking from the heart and that is what gives what he says such impact. It’s a great message too!
Laura de Maskens
Not squeamish subject material at all Jeff.
I really like you and what you have to say, it makes complete sense to me and it is something I have been doing naturally for as long as I can remember. The reason I enjoy the company of people that are achieving is that I admire them enormously.
For example I have always been attracted to men who are high income earners, not because of the money they make but because of their intelligence and commitment to their chosen careers. I admire them and am proud of their achievements. Unfortunately I am still single and looking for my life partner but that is fine. I have met some wonderful people on my journey and I am grateful.
I also enjoy the company of other women who are high achievers for the exact same reason, I feel proud of them and fortunate that they enjoy my company and we learn from one another.
Thanks Jeff your a good guy.
Love Laura
Iannacone
Hi! I was about to leave a ‘thank you comment’ for one more simple ‘down to earth’ advice that applies to all. After reading yours I could not have said it any better so I will simply add “Please refer to Laura’s comment below!”. You ‘nailed it’ right and I’m sure that many share the same feelings toward Jeff as a person and of course about his work. So thank you to you too Laura!!! for your elaborate comment. Nadia
Martina Vysluzilova
This is such an important message Jeff:) Great to hear it, thank you! It is so true that getting rid of what/who doesn’t inspire and motivate us for our greater purpose, or getting rid of what/who doesn’t allow us to be truly ourselves, is so liberating and automatically brings us to a next level. Everyone should be filtering and inventorying their relationships.
Janyse Hrynkow, MA
Sounds good you are so thankful for what you have learned
cause you like this new groups …message being reach out to even higher than you think of yourself if you want to make more money…reach out to engage in interesting dialogue be it spiritual or common interest..reach out to know you belong to any group…every group what ever group you want to because you will still need to nestle i with this new group and find your way in, Two ways of learning Jeff to copy and model or to grow and feel the experience yourself. Thanks
Beverly Snider
You’re on point!!
Ulrike
Realy sweet, Jeff, very personal. The opposite of hypey, which is refreshing.
Felicia Mareels
I too feel a little squeamish about the idea of upgrading so I don’t use this word. What I feel about it is that there is a different conversation that needs to happen when your transforming your life. as you are expanding the possibilities of your experience it is natural to want to swim, move, dance in the direction and with those who are already in the motion of a creative experience that you would like to have.
Does it mean that you will have to leave friends and colleagues behind? sometimes. Why? Because the support that you may discover that you require is not present in the persons who are struggling and have so far not shown that they are ready for a new chapter in successful living and business.
In my experience I have not needed to leave persons like this behind. They seem not to be attracted to me in the vibrancy that I express as i discover new ways of creating and attracting abundance.
Good video Jeff
Smiles
Felicia
Ellen
I understand what you are going for here. I would go for slightly different language behind it but that isn’t what is important here. To evolve one has to be willing to kearn and grow, to get out of the comfort zone and to stretch yourself. Widening your circle of contacts and getting to know some pretty cool people is a good way to do that.
Cher Kiltoff
Excellent! Excellent!!
Rick McFarland
This is EXACTLY why mastermind is so important. Each person can help each other, challenge each other and support each other. And raise the value of the entire group. And you my man are the best leader in that space by far !!! Thanks for this reminder.
Jeff Walker
@Rick: you hit the nail on the head… I have experienced few things that are as powerful as a good mastermind. It truly leverages this principle.
Steven
Hi Jeff
Are there mastermind groups in England and how could I find them?
Vicki Howie
Hi Jeff,
Will you be my friend?
LOL!
This IS a wee bit controversial/ “squeamish” — and just downright true.
Good for you! I always love your stuff.
Going to go work on my charisma and presence.
Can you tell us how to actually DO that in your next video?
Thanks so much — many blessings, Vicki
John Page
Jeff,
I am sure that everyone tells you this, but I still must say it. You are a truly great person. The concept that you have presented is totally true. Voiced from a negative perspective, I had an old coach who used to say, “If you hang around with dogs, you are going to get up with fleas.”
You have truly blessed me. Thanks pal.
John Page
Heinz
Great talk, thanks! Especially the advice to create value to extraordinary people is a very valuable suggestion to me.
Paulo
Jeff this is one of the best blogs you’ve done. You are so right and it is so true. I’ve lived in 7 countries across 4 different continents and needless to say, I’ve met people from all walks of life at merely 31 years of age. You’re right about this topic being perceived by some as controversial, but thank you for coming out and just telling it like it is. You gave me an idea for something to address with my audience. Regards, Paulo.
Jeff Walker
@Paulo: thanks… and to tell the truth, I just wasn’t so sure how this one would go over. 🙂
Marcello Vieira
This is the truth!!! You can’t put more simple!! Congratulations!!
Bryan Toder
Exactly!
That’s why last year I took inventory of my friends. I zapped a few and created the opportunity to add the exceptional people who have become new friends.
My life is so different now.
Marco
Hi Jeff,
true! I want to have five new friends. How about you Jeff, Frank Kern, Brendon Burchard, John Chow and Jeremy Shoemaker.
🙂
cu
Marco
Jeff Walker
@Marco: well… I don’t know John Chow, but the others are all pretty fun to hang out with. 🙂
Ricci
Hello from a sunny UK! Great video Jeff. And spot on as ever! I have experienced this myself over the past few years and it was a revelation to me when I first heard this, so I know how much this video will help those who haven’t heard this before.
Keep up the great work!
mitchell
Hi Jeff
Love your term “Upgrade Yourself” and this is one of your most energized blog posts yet!
Much of the richness and fulfillment in life comes from extraordinary relationships, and connecting with people who energize and get you charged and who you charge up as well.
Really enjoying the extraordinary people in the Platinum group, which has been a huge upgrade for me…thank you for attracting so many heart based, conscious entrepreneurs and leaders to your mastermind. Out with George Dias on july 4th and his incredible fiancé Lilly and breakfast with Dori Etter on Thursday and will be connecting with Gai soon. The SF Bay area plats are Rockin!
I also like the framing of long term friends and growth friends, especially when you are working on something beyond and outside the box of many friends you’ve grown up with.
Its truly magical to have a group of growth friends who have similar big visions to make change in the world, and masterminds whether structured or informal, nurture and support those visions.
love your sunday blogs!
Very Best Regards
Mitchell
+Neville Swaby
+Jeff Walker i play this video three times i cant believed you hit this topic now. Reason been i came to realize this about three year ago now,and so i decided to reorganized my life in this type of way. Here you come with the same suggestion i am working on you hit a great
motivational speech thanks for the reminder.
Bill
I have heard this message in the past Jeff and I have to agree it is a great journey expanding your expression of yourself and the amazing things that happen when you do. Being authentic is the key and then holding gratitude for the connections you make keeps you on track. We all have it in us.
Life changing stuff Jeff, thank you.
Luciano
Hello Jeff.
I am Brazilian and I had the misfortune of being born poor. All I (try to) win depends on myself. For me, it is almost impossible to have contact with great people like you, and most people around me are selfish or otherwise, they have nothing to add me. So I spend almost all my extra time looking for content that will help me to give me an upgrade.
But the question is: How can I achieve this ugrade considering the circumstances that surround me? Will see motivators videos on the internet, really help me? Or will only depress me?
Jeff Walker
@Luciano: there are extraordinary people in every circumstance – it doesn’t matter if you’re poor or rich. No matter where in the world you are, there are absolutely going to be extraordinary people who are around you.
Whether you are rich or poor, there will be selfish people, there will be small-minded people, there will be jealous people. And whether you’re rich or poor, there will also be generous people, there will be kind people, there will be motivated people.
It’s your job to find those people that will lift you up, and that you can lift up… and then build relationships with those people.
Manjusri Horsman
Beautiful reply Jeff, full of truth and your abundance of heart!
callliao
Dear Geoff, you are such a great response!
Anne Benissan
Hello Luciano,
I understand what you are saying from a different perspective than Jeff’s reply to you. I am not Brazilian but I am French and my business, the book I wrote , the podcast I am doing are all in English. It takes extra effort to work in a different language. I have close friends who are Brazilian and their online business is in English and they come from a rather well off family. The money that they started with is not what makes them successful, it is more the belief that they have been brought up with. They were raised feeling confident about their future, while you were raised thinking that you are on your own to make do what you can. If you work on that belief you will open many doors. Other people have done that before you, Tony Robbins is the example that comes to my mind. You already have a fantastic asset, you understand and speak English so you have two great tools. I don’t know what you do but I can tell you that if you start a blog in English you will make connections with like minded people and you will open your world to amazing, inspiring people that you don’t even need to meet physically. Another great source of inspiration is podcasts: a lot of them are free and give you amazing content to ponder, laugh, or think about. All it takes is an internet connection. Good luck Luciano and blessings to you.
Julie
I love this video Jeff. Could you do a video on how to create a mastermind group, how to find 4-5 people to grow with and hold each other accountable? Not a paid mastermind group (those can be great too) just looking to create a mastermind group with other entrepreneurs.
Thanks!
Jeff Walker
@Julie: that’s a great question… I think I’ll shoot a video on that one.
Sue
Great idea, Julie
Frank
For @Julie – You may be interested in this post by Michael Hyatt. http://michaelhyatt.com/launch-a-mastermind.html
Mick Grad
Thanks Jeff.
You have smiled. And I also smile.
It’s good idea: Smile at Life, and she will smile at you in return!
Ivan
Jeff,this Is 100% correct being 67 year “young” I have meet a lot people in my life who after you spend an hour with them you felt totally drained of most of your life force, your positive energy…those people always talk about the things that just CAN’T be done because of “zillions” of reasons, and not one reason why they CAN do anything about their situations…I call this disease “Excusitis” it’s serious disease, which could become chronic if not cured on time, is is not easy to cure if “patient” suffers from it for a long time and never tried to look for remedy to help himself.Here are just a few of symptoms of “Excusitis”…
I can’t do it because I am too old…
I can’t do it because I am too young..
I can’t do it because I am “born”poor…
I can’t do it because I am “disabled”…
I can’t do it because I am a women..
I can’t do it because I am an immigrant…
I can’t do it because I have no education…
I can’t do it because I am broke…
I can’t do it because I am of different color…
and there maybe few more I haven’t heard
about yet… I often tell my new customers/friends
that I am able to help them with most of those “problems” but
the last one…for the last “problem” I told them to call President
Obama, because he did win his second term, so it was not just
fluke or “luck”…he won it despite being African American, so much for this excuse. All of us despite all of above “problems”[excuses] have seeds of greatness inside of us, just waiting to be discovered.
Stay around positive people, look for positive people and be friend with positive people and you too will become more positive and much better in all you are doing.
Darcy Lewis
I know this and I can meet and greet people easily. I go to seminars, but never get past the “friendly” stage with anyone, ever, anywhere. I have friends I’ve had since kindergarten, friends from tennis, friends from where I used to work, but the friendship never goes out of the original arena. I can’t seem to push myself to deepen any new acquaintances. I know I really need to especially as it relates to my new business endeavors.
Aaron Applebaum
Hi Jeff,
I liked your webcast. And I think you were referring to the mean rather than to the average. There is a difference.
All the best,
Aaron
Marco
Hi Jeff,
thanks. Believe it or not. I know John. We stay in E-Mail contact. I stalked him a little bit, or better said i insisted a lot and now he answers. He is a nice guy 😉
But if i follow your logic, Top-Earners will only hang around with other Top-Earners and thats also true, isnt it, Jeff?!
I have to uplift my intrinsic value through knowledge, try and error, massive action and getting better from day to day. The outcome will follow…
Damon Williams
Thanks for saying this out loud! This is such positive and practical advice.
Jim Perry
Great reminder!! I tell myself this principle, but I don’t put it into action. I am a general dentist and I am surrounded all day long by (wonderful) people as employees and patients, but these people usually are not the people I need to surround myself with to grow. It takes effort, but the end result is good. I believe you can surround yourself with the Brendon Burchards, etc by listening to their programs, reading their blogs, etc. you can put them in your circle without having them physically present in your life. Your thinking can resonate with theirs as a result.
Nathalie Villeneuve
This was so timely for me Jeff, I always want to continue to upgrade and uplevel the members of my community aa well as my loved ones. You gave me an answer to some questions I’ve had recently concerning weekly events I am creating without my facebook group. Great topic…loved it! ~ Nathalie
Nash
Thanks Jeff! I just love your smile and charasmatic presence.
I’ve heard this message before at some other seminars I’ve attended..
So it’s a great reminder for me to get out there and add more
value to other people’s lives. Would you please do some blogs on
“How to be more charasmatic” and “How to shine from the inside out” …
like how you do? Cheers 🙂
Jade Campbell
Thanks Jeff, your warmth and charisma is a joy to experience, I guess part of that comes from having a degree of contentment and security with ones acheivements. Part of trying to break free from your existing chains/restrictions is to feel secure and content with your current circumstance, which is not always an easy thing to do.
I too would like to start a mastermind here in Brisbane Australia – simply to mix with like minded people, so some tips on the best way to formalise a group such as this would be about the greatest motivator right now.
Thanks so much for being you, Jade Campbell
Christina Suntum
Thank you Jeff for making this blog! I keep getting reminded of that whenever I’m with the plat group. In the last year this means that I let a lot of friendships die out because I can’t stand the Danish negativity or very mediocre way of thinking. So I only talk to my very close friends and don’t know how to meet great people in my own country. They seem to be clustered in the US which of course isn’t true. So THANK you I will find a seminar in Denmark and find some cool Danish persons!!!
Jeff Walker
@Christina: you’re absolutely right… there are amazing people everywhere, and you will definitely find some in Denmark. In fact, I personally know an amazing person from Denmark. 😉
Cam
Thanks Jeff. I suppose it’s easier to not challenge current thinking. I commend you for having the courage to say it. I understand. You’re not talking about ditching current contacts that are not ‘making the grade’. What I heard was focus on adding value! Most important, do not try and be something you’re not. Be authentic. It’s a really great message about networking – do it without an agenda, be unconditional. See how much value you can add in as many places as possible. The value will flow back our way in no time.
Thanks again
Cam
Steve Schatz
Not a new concept, but the relaxed, authentic presentation jiggled something. It’s not about being mercenary…. befriending people for what they can do for you, but seeing how you can be of service to them. Then letting that evolve into a relationship. However, seeking folks that are moving, growing, doing… not just living in the oughta, coulda, shoulda, intrigue and gossip… which accomplishes nothing. Talking and trying to work with these folks is like a second piece of pie on a full stomach. Not as good as it looked and all I can do afterwards is go to sleep.
Since I’ve been teaching online during the last year in an online masters program, I have found the enormous power of being able to put up vids related to discussions we have had. It’s not as rich a communication as face to face, but moving from canned vid classes with the web as a delivery system to really using the web and the community of purpose (as you do.. I would never have watched this if I hadn’t known you through PLF and a live event) is the next big evolution of this medium. It approaches the immediacy and spontaneity of a conversation, with immediate, free, widespread distribution. Cool beans.
Jim Miotke
Hi Jeff
Thank you! As always, you and your message is awesome.
I have always had a challenge, though, processing this principle of the social average.
The reason is that, as an Internet business owner, I rarely hang out with anyone. I love my family and interact with my staff, but rarely am social with others. I’ve had a really hard time keeping relationships with great people I meet at live events strong.
Any advice my friend?
Jeff Walker
@Jim: This is a great question… which I’ve come to expect out of you. 🙂
I might shoot a video on this – especially the part about following up with people you meet at events. Remember… I live out in the mountains in Colorado – my chances to hang out in person are few and far between. There’s lots of other ways to stay in contact – they might not be ideal, but phone, text, email, skype, etc all help build your relationships. I think the key thing is to pick the one or two people you meet at an event that you intend to follow up with… and then do it.
Jennifer
Hi Jeff, Another reason I see for continuing to cultivate relationships with amazing people is because of the increased contribution our COMBINED efforts, intentions, ideas and energy can make to the world. I was going to use the word “synergy” but …
I think in the end it’s all bout giving.
Thanks for the great posts.
Mynders Glover
Hi Jeff:
Thanks for the great reminder. I like the way you broke this down into two principles: 1) update your relationships and 2) working on being a better attractor (charisma).
I’ve found that I’m a better attractor when I’m focused on providing a service that I’m excited about and which is manageable in my life. When I feel overwhelmed, it seems my energy goes to maintaining myself, rather than reaching out.
And, if you have that combo of a focus and a Mastermind group to reinforce that focus it really comes together. I appreciate the opportunity I had recently to observe that dynamic in action with some of your Platinums in a social setting.
Tom Pearce
Great topic Jeff. I always enjoy self improvement conversations…how to be, have and do more. The “BE” is a prime ingredient…and not just $ but also in the areas you mentioned: Spirituality, health, relationships, etc… The inner beliefs affect the outer manifestations and the outer influences, circle of friends, affect the inner picture and results…which one has more pull? I bet you would recommend improving both…
Awareness and action are my two takeaways from your blog message.
Blessings,
Tom
Karen Homann
Jeff,
You are so right about the people you hang out with ; I think it is because you have the same interest .
I would like you to be my friend !
I listened to your promotion that you had recently and I hope you got a great turn out by it . I was amazed you mentioned that you had massage therapist under your wing . I wish I could of perceived that for myself .
Have a good one
Karen Homann
sweta
I tried to post this on your “why” blog but it would not post- so doing it here 🙂
Hi Jeff, I love this post it so resonates with what I have learned this past year in my own transformation. I was introduced to you through Brendon B’s program and I think I speak for most of the audience: your authenticity is palpable. I created a frame work around my mess “Make Your World Bigger” after realizing the purpose of my mom’s suffering was too show me what living is small life does to your well being and health and then the birth of my premature son showing me the same. One aspect of my frame work is called Dig Big and its about getting to know your self and connecting to your OWN personal why. Its the place that drives you and the place you can always come back to when you find yourself needed to make a decision. I would love to refer to your blog as it is so well put – would that be okay? I hope you get this 🙂 Thank you for being such an awesome role model! Sweta
Carolyn Fung
Thanks for another great video, Jeff. All entrepreneurs at any level deal with mindset ups and downs. It’s amazing how having a conversation with someone or listening to someone who is at a different level or sees a “obstacle” differently can help turn my mind around when I need it. I don’t think this post is controversial. People grow and change. Also, some relationships I have might not nurture my current level in business (so I add new ones) but they add value in other ways and I can still keep them. I just make sure to only share my up-level dreams with the up-leveled people.
Maryalice
This is a great video and I thank you. Can’t hear this information enough! I appreciate your work and very helpful videos!
Steve
Too squishy? Hardly. How about, bullseye!
Have you noticed that the central focus of all organizational development consulting today is culture?! Nothing builds organizational performance more than stronger, smarter attention to relationships and cultural identity around the goals and mission of any organization—for good or for ill.
A problem though. Self-upgrade behaviors will not become habits without first replacing the thinking behind the self-defeating ones. Nothing squishy there—the science-based discipline of Axiogenics was highly praised by Stephen Covey before his untimely passing.
I’ve followed your growth since Tony Robbins’ “New Money Masters” teaching. Hope to meet and know you soon.
Best, Steve
ivana
Dear Jeff,
I THANK YOU !
You are a good inspirer. God bless you!
Wil
Great insight Jeff!
I do have several “upgrades” to my circle of associates & friends and it has impacted my life greatly.
One of my mentors taught me the “echo effect” and states it like this. “You can be around anyone you choose. If your family or friends are not supportive of what you desire to accomplish then get closer to the people, places, ideas, mentors, & groups that are.”
The closer you’re surrounded by the “echo effect” or target group the faster you get to your goals.
So your family, friends, & associates can be in different circles around you creating different level of “echo” for the desired outcome.
amit
Hey Jeff,
Superb video. Very nice and something which truly resonates with me.
Thanks
Amit
Clinton
Jeff, I like that you brought up the whole 5 people thing. The influences that we surround ourselves with has quite an impact on our own outcomes.
Thanks again.
Maya
Thank you Jeff for the video.
About 7 years ago I decided to go on a quest to become exceptional .
It’s amazing what I have learned since then and the
amazing people I have met and attracted.
I do have an amazing network of people from my past, my present and my future all surrounding me and enriching my life.
I constantly thinking and being intentional about
upgrading myself.
And love that its a lifelong journey:)
Tina Scheiner
Great Post … Thank You. I’ve linked this to my FB Page as I know everyone should see this. Hanging out with people you admire … what better thing to do.
Tina
David Durand
I jumpstarted my business to the next level by joining a mastermind last year on your recommendation and through 2 min of laser coaching on one of your calls, so thanks for that. The mastermind was the answer to a question I posed to you on stage on the final day of your first live event. You gave me an answer then, but your email about the mastermind was the one that clicked for me. It’s important for us to check in with our intuition before making those new connections and before making big investments in our businesses, and where there is that “click,” the growth will follow.
Sergio Felix
Hey Jeff, I do hang out with some big players and I am friend with a few of them but I never thought about trying to do something for them before (I’ve always have seen them as “gurus” or really advanced marketers even if I consider them my friends) and there are certainly things I can do for them so thank you for the awesome advice man!
Sergio
Glen DeShaw
Such simple advice, making so much sense! Thanks Jeff!
Kim
Excellent inspirational video – as usual. Thanks a lot! Now – HOW IS YOUR KNEE? Let us know how your are doing with that.
Jeff Walker
@Kim: thanks for asking… the surgery was on 7/3, so I’m four days post-op. The surgery went well… all good news when they got inside and looked around.
My recovery has been amazingly smooth… the day after surgery I went for a 20 minute walk on our land. Two days after surgery I was on the bike trainer and doing a simple yoga program. If it keeps up at this pace, I expect to get out for a real bike ride this week.
Michael Neal
I have heard this many times now for several years and you are 100% correct. This will go way more than income, it will include personality traits, ethics, morals, lifestyle and more. Last week I turned 50 and I am finally ready to network and share more with marketers in a study-group of some type, just not certain which one to look into.
Have a blessed day,
Michael
Susan
Thank you. As a 59 year old who is trying to develop a more vibrant marketing of my mlm than just the replicated website I appreciate your encouragement. There is so much advice out there that it is easy to become overwhelmed and tempted to give up.
Voss Graham
Jeff,
Great video and the content is very sound.
I believe one of the keys to a person’s success is their ability to take self-responsibility and move towards their lifestyle choice (can be a goal or a problem to solve). One of the best methods for advancement is to learn from the people who are doing what you want to do now. Then, model them to reach your objectives.
You are one of the role models I watch and listen to whenever I can. Your wisdom is very helpful and simple to understand – you are straight forward in your advice so I enjoy it.
Glad to hear the knee surgery went well and you are progressing quickly with the recovery.
Jeff, have a Great Day and an even better Week.
Voss
Joan
Jeff,
I’ve heard this in many places. It’s so true!
Here’s proof: I make friends easily, but I’ve been isolating for a number of years and am down to about 1 friend. And my income is at about a 1 also…
Mitchell
Jeff, I needed to hear that…..
Anthony
Always good stuff, Jeff. Thanks again.
James Klobasa
Jeff,
As always, great stuff… I have to agree with Norman’s comment (#1).
I have always seen you as the humble quiet guy, a great quality, but its even better to see the more energetic, light side of you also.
All the best… James.K
france
Hello Jeff, happy to know the surgery is over and you begin again to mobilize. This is a great new and make me happy.
your recovery will go very fast and very soon, you will forget the surgery…;-))
Yes, there are many nice people in the world , a lo oft people helping those who need help. Myself, I met them during all my life..and if i am who i am to day it’s thanks to them. i am so grateful!!!
i hope i have been able to help those who came to me for help. i wish to do more and for more people. i am convinced God follows us and offer us the opportunities we need.. i think you are : THE FRIEND” and “the Magician” God allows me to meet ;-)).. Reallly thanks to you I am discovering new ways and also a new way to understand my life, my struggles and the gifts i am receiving.I hope to learrn more and more to be able to give more and more. Thanks Jeff
Robert
Nice. Thoughtful. True. Makes us stretch. Thanks
Don Sabelhaus
Great video Jeff, all I can say is that I couldn’t agree with you more.
Tammy
Jeff,
I just have to compliment you on yet another great post. I enjoy your posts because you are so real and sincere and always share something from the heart. I hope to one day be able to meet you in person and listen to you speak at an event.
Keep up the great work!
Tam
Remco
Jeff,
I just have a feeling that if you setup a platform where people can find each other (based on goals and expertise) to form a mastermind, it would be a great success….
Janine
Thank you for your video! I needed the reminder to be present with people. I was doing really well at it until the end of June. So, back on the wagon of being present with everyone I am in contact.
Uli
Nice post Jeff!
I like that you clarified it’s not about throwing away your old friends. I’ve heard the same “rule of 5” before, but everyone else has been very ruthless about the rule, which I never agreed with. Thanks for putting a gentler, more compassionate angle on it.
Pam
I am in desperate NEED of an upgrade!!! I was just talking about that subject. Thank you so much for confirming it in my mind.
Mark C
@Marco. You said: “But if i follow your logic, Top-Earners will only hang around with other Top-Earners and thats also true, isnt it, Jeff?!” I think you’re right. Most millionaires would not want to make friends with someone who’s poor. One way to approach this is to do it gradually. Make friends with good people who are ‘positive’ compared to you. Slowly over time, you could raise yourself.
Jeff Walker
@Mark @Marco: I think you’re both missing the point… there are many measures of a person besides how much money they have – that was a big point I was trying to make in this video. People who are successful want to be around exceptional high-value people… that doesn’t necessarily mean “rich” exceptional high-value people. There are many ways to be exceptional or to be a leader… you might be exceptionally kind, or exceptionally good at relationships, or in exceptional physical shape, or an exceptional musician or artist, on an exceptional teacher, etc, etc
Michelle Kumnick
I must say that I do agree with Jeff. He did also mention about still being friends with people that he met before he went on this journey of creating online businesses that have opened many doors for him. Everyone is a work in progress, but I find that the ones that push themselves in more areas of their life than one or two are more focused and authentic people who will give you the support and help when you need it. And if you can find people that are exceptional in one area, that is better than hanging around those who feel sorry for themselves and don’t want to grow and change; that don’t believe that things could get better. I find that very draining myself. I tend to find though that if they are exceptional in one area, they tend to want to improve themselves in others, but are just trying to find a way to do it too. That’s where you may be able to add value for them.
Dave
True intrinsic value of a relationship is measured in what you can give to it and get out of it. I believe the best relationships are stemmed from a personal connection to one another and when both you can learn and teach. Jeff, I agree you are what you eat and you are what surround yourself with, so I believe in surrounding myself with a diverse group complimenting and challenging my views on life. It’s been great to watch your video’s over time and to see that success doesn’t mean undermining who you are or what you believe in. Thanks for doing what you do.
Floyd Florence
Uhh, where you say you gonna be hanging out next?
Kasama Lee
*** You are the sum of the 5 people closest to you. ***
As a leadership development trainer/speaker, and someone who has proven this theory in my own life, I was watching your message smiling from ear to ear. As a matter of fact, I just started my new blog called www.lifeofgreatness.com because I feel so strongly that we can achieve greatness (money, spirituality, health, relationships, success, leadership etc.) in our lives if we would stay in the conversations with those whose life we want to have. Unfortunately, many of us end up staying in the conversations with those who are crying for help and are miserable so the crab syndrome kicks in. Good for you Jeff. I think this topic is not at all controversial. If one would study all the true leaders and successful people in history, this is literally how they changed the outcome of their lives, by being around those who can see their possibilities before they can see for themselves. LOVE IT! Keep talking. I’m listening. Thanks!
Robert
Jeff, thank U for that video. Everything U have said is 110% TRUTH :).
Fit Missy
This was much needed, very helpful – thank you! =)
Listened to it 2x
Ron
There is another aspect to this. When you add a really exceptional person to your circle you also now have some access to their network, which means you can boost your circle of very interesting people quickly.
Wong Chendong
After hearing what you said, it’s really true about what kind of people you know determine which level of life you are in.
I had been lucky to know some amazing people online and offline.
Especially people with great minds.
But again, in order to upgrade oneself, oneself must know what kind of amazing people to know as not every amazing people are really amazing… there are some people on the outside he or she might look amazing but in the inside… it’s totally rubbish.
Hans
Great topic to speak about, Jeff. Yes, of course it is important to surround ourselves with valuable people. Sometimes it is also hard because of the location or country we live in.
However I believe when we stand behind this idea or advice, there will always be people who are willing to help us a hand. It also depends on yourself if you are doing good things for other people than usually it comes back in some kind of form. To get to a higher level in your life, I think, you should meditate. It gives you the inspiration to take the right steps in the right direction. I’m an artist (music arranger) myself so I’m pretty sensitive and serious to these kind of things. Thanks for bringing this up, with kind regards, Hans
Dave Wardle
This stuff really works. Using these techniques I have met some very exceptional people. It develops friendships that are immensely enjoyable and creates a more fulfilling life. It also helps building good personal character by stimulating one’s thoughts on how to make a contribution to someone’s life rather than what you can get out of a relationship. Kudos to you Jeff for crystallizing these thoughts, undertaking the creation of this video, and sharing it with us!
Julie Musial
This video is right on in my opinion. Jeff, sometimes you need to say good bye to friends if they’re negative and raining on your parade.
Don McAvinchey
Yep, well done Jeff. We get ‘warped’ by who we hang out with, for sure. There’s nothing we can do about it, we are social creatures as you point out. The wisdom, as you also point out, is to make good choices in our circles of influence. No doubt. Thanks for this one, you’re right on.
Trace Haskins
Hey Jeff, loved the video, I had this realization a few months back and have since been surrounding myself with people I admire (for any number of reasons) and their teachings and have been on a constant journey to build new relationships. I haven’t said goodbye to anyone in my life, just hello to some great new people. And it’s really helping me produce better results in all areas of my life and business. As an earlier commenter said, “This stuff works”. 🙂
Satish
Great one Jeff!
It’s more of energy you derive by being in company of such people. It’s contagious and most of time it works.
BTW, How you can smile while you speak – is it practice or some technique.
-Sa
Christine
Jeff, well said. I was just talking to a friend about the very same topic. You have explained it so much better than I did. I think when many people hear about being the average, especially when it’s positioned in income, of the 5 people they hang with they think they have to get rid of their friends. You’ve positioned it in such a way that when we change ourselves our friends change.
Thanks for the insight. I agree with an earlier comment that this is really stretching yourself and taking yourself to the next level of being an exceptional person. Good on you Jeff.
Patricia Reszetylo
THANK YOU! Yes, I completely agree – which is why I fired my business partner this spring, and in finding a new coach, ASKED what their income is… if I’m gonna catch fleas, I want them to be “good” fleas.
Ray Edwards
Jeff, this is one of your very best posts. I think of this principle as “positive peer pressure”. Although now, after having watched your video, I may change that terminology to “positive peer presence”. Thanks for how you show up, and what you bring to the world. (PS-congratulations on your successful surgery and quick recovery!)
Helene Feilberg
“Love your family, choose your peers” as Tony Robbins would say. I love your post Jeff. I love your honesty and how you blontly say how you feel. THIS is the way to inspire others. To be HONEST! And bu the way, this IS in fact how things work. Your energy, motivation, inspiration is very influenced by with whom you spend your time! Thanks for sharing!! 🙂
Africanfarmer Mogaji
Hi Jeff,
What you spoke about is the principle of association. Two weeks ago I decided I needed to increase my income and went to reestablish contact with a friend who is a multi millionaire to learn from him. Its very obvious if I want to make $500,000 leveraging on the internet I should study any products developed by you and Brendon Burchard. This principle is universal, its working in Nigeria, West Africa. Thanks, Africanfarmer Mogaji
Ram
Jeff, great video – again! This is better than Napolean Hill’s master mind alliance since its with real people. This is what makes your posts interesting – Its simple but states the obvious.
Thank You,
Ram
denise cooney
Jeff, you are a rock star! I work for myself and also work part time for a company. I hear you one hundred per cent. What you bring into the lives of others is an automatic upgrade. I work closely with a person who always knocks down people who share their amazing stories. Just this morning someone came in very excited. They met Bruce Springsteen at a friends wedding and Bruce asked him to work for him. He was over the moon knowing this would be a great connection. This co worker announced loudly, ” I am not impressed. I do not like Bruce.” I said sincerely and with tongue in cheek. “Hey tell him he forgot to marry me. I am so happy for you what a great experience.” There are always people who are unable to see value in the upgrade of living. Life is a series of experiences always.
I always meet great people at workshops. I am so happy to have met you through the internet. Keep the great messages coming. I am a fan…Peace to you.
Dodi
I have heard similar comments, but no one addressed that it is fine to keep your old friends! Good job! I really only like to phase out the soul-sucking vampires…and some of those are relatives!
The only successful people I “know” are on the internet…and somehow that is like cheering for Superman and Batman. Feels good, but not real! I would like to figure out how to create value so a “superhero” would value my friendship…it just seems that they have it all together! (I know they are human) I am going to my first live rally in 2 weeks and am looking forward to it!
I totally enjoy your blogs. Thanks for all you do, Jeff!
David Jones
Hi Jeff,
Great talk. I agree, but the challenge is that those people that have tremendous success tend to hang with other like people. In other words, they tend not to go backward in there connections, but look for more successful people then themselves. So breaking into an circle of people the next level above you is not very easy. I would say that it is extremely hard. So I don’t know how you break out of the vicious cycle.
David
Cori
Thanks Jeff….your video has really resonated with me today. The right message at the right time!
Cori
Mike Irving
Hey Jeff,
You are “spot on” with this message. It is just like sports… if you want to get better in a sport, you play with better players. I found that very helpful. Isn’t it true… if you want to get in better shape or lose weight, you tend to connect with others at the gym or on the diet plan. Marketing seems to be the same. Listening to people who do it Better than me… tends to help me improve my skills more quickly than trying to figure it out all on my own.
Thanks Jeff… great message!
Mike Irving
Michael Rich
Beautiful video, Jeff.
Create value, and share your EDGE in life with the people around you.
I am a HUGE fan of masterminding, and have weekly Hangouts to bring out the best in the community. Upgrading my clients, and friends in life was a very powerful move.
Today, I am upgrading my clients, and friends once again…, as my value continues to increase online. This time in the information product / motivational speaking arena.
As always, a pleasure tuning into your videos.
Anna Aberg
You did it again! Thas why I’m attending mastermindgroups and I hope to meet you someday 🙂
Naomi Yamaguchi
I have hugely powerful and famous friends, really worldclass celebrities and I have nothing. For the moment… Because I believe that we all have greatness inside and if my friends can see that on me and the world see that on them… Then it is a matter of time and perception to see that myself and explore it in a productive way. Maybe I just feel I am still down because they raised the bar so high. But I know that their energy and thought pattern can only be contagious! Waiting to be totally contaminated! And contagiate all around me after!
Sallie
I’ve heard of this concept with the focus being on the economic status of the 5 people you hang with the most and have wondered if not wanting to lose valued friendships could cause self-sabotage in my business. You have broadened this perspective so thank you!
Kim Matheson
Hey Jeff good video. Like attracts like right! It’s great to hear from people who want to encourage others to broaden their horizons and step up to network with the greats. Giving is receiving, and this is also about attitude within one self. I tell my kids gratitude creates great attitudes. Tony Robbins teaches this well, so done Brendon Burchard. The messages share by you legends is spot on. Keep ut the great work. Cheers from down under New Zealand. Bloody cold at the moment though. Kind regards Kim 🙂
Michel
Hi Jeff!
Thank you so much for the advice and your super-energy….:)
Greets from the Netherlands.
Michel
Marianne
Thanks Jeff as always for your wise & smart videos !!
Larry Gamboa
Jeff, simple yet so true. I’m Larry from Manila and a Seed Launch student. July 25 to 27 I am going to Hongkong then Macau with 7 men who are part of a Mastermind Group headed by a young man named Bo Sanchez. Bo is the top internet marketer in the Philippines earning millions of pesos and dollars through his membership site. Bo invited me and 6 other men (4 are billionaires) into a mastermind group more than 2 years ago and we meet monthly each taking turns hosting. Result? I am overwhelmed with gratitude at being invited to the group (no charge). I am the oldest but the least wealthy member of the group. Jeff, my next wish is to go to your Live PLF formula at Denver Colorado. A Toast to PLF and the Philippines and the 100,000,000 I dream of reaching out to with your help. God bless your work daily.
Canon Wing
This is so true. It’s also true about the level of health, happiness, and productivity of your circle of friends. This is why masterminding is so intensely useful. Thanks for the reminder Jeff! Great post! I’m going to go work out with my husband now to keep our shared vitality up up up.
mark grove
Great vid Jeff. I guess what I need to do is to be more genuine with those who’s lives I want to emulate, so to speak, and yes create value for them. Not just to hang with them which shouldn’t be a huge priority, but learn and make other people’s lives better.
Hope that makes sense Jeff.
Mark in Canada
Les Kiger
Hi Jeff,
Here’s something that may help you to talk about this topic and totally diffuse a lot of the “squeemishness.”
Have you ever studied the integral theory work of Ken Wilber?
One of the key premises of the work is that everything has four aspects, summarized for this scenario (self upgrade) (my terms): psychology, actions, relationships, environment.
So often we try to only change one aspect. We work really hard to change our psychology but don’t work on upgrading our relationships or we go into a whole new environment (say a new job) but don’t look at changing our psychology or the way we act.
Essentially, whatever of the four is the “lowest” will be a kind of anchoring point that will always be “holding you down.” So, relationship “upgrades” are just as important as psychology upgrades, environment upgrades, and action upgrades. And just like you don’t have to hate or disparage who you were, the way you acted, or where you hung out in order to have growth in those areas, you also don’t have to write off your “old” relationships just to bring new growth-oriented relationships into the picture.
I hope that helps some! I think this was a fabulous video and a super-important topic.
Les Kiger
Mark C
Hi Jeff, I understood your point (although money was one of the things you brought up). I was really responding to Marco.
I still think my point is valid. Most very successful people will not have the time or inclination to make friends with people who are not. It may be necessary to build up, by developing relationships with people who are successful compared to you (in whatever quality).
Jason T
So many people are not willing to put effort in what they do. They are just on cruise control. Putting time in for their life. We are meant for so much more. Nice vlog.
Deborah O
omgosh, you are adorable. and wise. Thank you for this post. I just found you somehow and will definitely follow you. this was helpful, inspiring and an excellent reminder.
Kigali Kev
Don’t worry at all Jeff.
This stuff is terrific. Exactly what I need.
I will put it into action 100% for the next month, and review my friendship status at the end of that time.
Trace Haskins
@Les Kiger: Great summary of the 4 aspects on this topic. It’s really true that changing only 1 or 2 of the 4 would produce limited results on its own – for a real breakthrough and paradigm shift, all 4 must experience changes. +10!
Derek Morgan
Hi Jeff,
The world is full of natural laws and principles that either work for you or against you. The problem is most people are either unaware of them, or through complacency don’t implement them in to their lives.
Great advice you have give us, and the context you did it gives great perspective.
Love the attitude of gratitude you have.
Cheers,
Derek
Kristen Poborsky
Great reminder! When you upgrade yourself by surrounding yourself with the right people you reset your thoughts.
I believe that then you start up-leveling your thought what you see and experience changes to reflect your thoughts.
Maria From Club Wellness
My husband complains because I spend ours on the phone giving advise and solutions to people and I make no money out of it. I love it, I don´t have a problem but I believe it needs to change.. Not that I will start charging my friends but maybe I should start looking at it as business.
John Wright
Jeff I like the way you care about others. Have found out experience brings
understanding and wisdom, just wish it didn’t take so long to get it. We miss
out on so many opportunities on our journey of getting that great experience.
Am grateful for life and giver of that life, Jesus, my Lord, Savior, Creator and
Living God.
Carmelinda
Now I got it! I was wondering where all of my friends had gone? LOL
Lorisue
fantastic. Thank you for clear and simple information that is also important for those of us who want to succeed and have abundance in our lives. At first I found it frightening to realize it was totally up to me- starting with me- to develop my best self, but as I make choices like who to hang out with – those friends help the fears disappear. I also like the idea that listening to audio books by someone like Joel Olsteen, Wayne Dyer or Tony Robins, makes my brain think I am best-buddies with them – lol
Thank you again.
I look forward to the “how to” 🙂
Irene Kabot
Outside my comfort zone, yes!!!
The big realization is that I go to events looking to get! I also need to look to give!
Thank you!
Irene
parthi
Thanks jaff i got more exciting about this video … really nice…..
Maxim
Wow, what an amazing way of seeing life !
I find this absolutely true !! Can’t believe it’s so simple and was just on the surface in front of my eyes all the time !!!
This is it, the true story of my life ))))
Now Jeff, you just “named” this abstract entity and transcribed into a bite size map of actions.
Thank you very much for this !!
I think I’m becoming your fan faster than it’s possible !!)))))))) And I’m glad it’s happening)))
sari koskenlinna-mäkeläinen
So…can I hang out with you then?:)
Gideon Hanekom
Great post Jeff! Ive been blessed to have learned this wisdom early on in life and apply it irrespective of the country or culture Ive lived in. I would like to shout you, Brendon and Tony a coffee someday..well Tony probably doesnt drink coffee..but you know what Im saying. Watch the space mate 🙂 From NZ, blessings to you!
Kerry-Ann Powell
Great stuff Jeff!! Always bringing it strong. I needed to be reminded of this truth.
Kumar Gauraw
The power of association! Absolutely the best advice Jeff. We become who we associate with. Upgrading ourselves means upgrading our association. Thank you for taking time to share this AWESOME tip. Really enjoyed watching this video!
Fabricio
Yes man!
Great smile,
light and love.
Greetings from Brazil
Fabricio
Barry Hughes
That was great, Jeff. Not sure how I got connected with you, it’s all a blur, but this felt like you’re reading my mail, although it’s the other way around. I’ve spent the past 15 years, but particularly the past year, focused on upgrading my own capacity for presence, working as a group facilitator with court-referred family violence clients in Orange County, CA. On 10/13 I’m launching a new business, offering groups (with non-compulsory attendance) to a larger population – the launch, or more accurately the pre-launch will be a gathering of friends and former clients: focus group, brainstorming (perhaps masterminding although I don’t yet know what your version is), celebrating, community-building, moving toward the next steps. Thank you for this morning’s inspiration. Barry
Marie Madigan
Thank you for this, Jeff. I think the core things that you mention – creating value for those people you admire, and being truly present when you’re with them – keeps the upgrading impulse from being something purely self-oriented. And creating value and being truly present are good rules for all relationships. Great food for thought.
Luc Bouchard
Hey Jeff, I really liked what you said in this blog. I personally believe that who we hang out with is a pure reflection upon what we believe we are worthy of and what we are deserving of in our lives.
Sandra Pilarczyk
Thank you Jeff for this! met some of the most inspirational and amazing people at live events! It is so true what you said about building value added relationships and to be present when you are with people!!
blandine
Titally agrre with you ! It just happened to me this morning. Consider all people around you as your teachers!
Have a good day
Penny
Jeff I have heard this tons of times. I have a few friends I find that I want more from my life than my friends. Everyone is so busy. I know in my heart that I am extraordinary. I strive to be the 2%. People arw drawn to me the ones who need fixin and I can not fix them. Lol they have to want to be fixed. I dont know I am frusteated.
Wanda Einfeldt
Awesome vlog tips. Sounds like (is) the Law of Attraction which I’m learning about in some books I’ve found. Thank you for sharing. Now to learn how to be more charismatic! 🙂
Michael Bely
Jeff, thank you for the video with simple but very important idea. I’ll just confirm it from my experience although not from my business life, but from my sport part of life.
Nine years ago I started to hang out with two mountaineers (I was a complete newbie in climbing) and after a while they suddenly invited me for one day gorgeous climb that I could not even dream of. It was so great to climb that snowy-icy rock and technically not easy (I could climb the same difficulty myself only years and years after training). But at that time being together with those two great guys helped me to experience that enormously cool climb. They dragged me almost all the way up, but anyway, it was something that very few people in the world have experienced in their life. And it was a great push for my mountaineering development.
I am sure the same principle of pushing to next limits can be applied with business master groups.
Geoff Hughes
Jeff, so true. True character never abandons long held friendships but also understands the wisdom and opportunity that comes with new friends that have achieved success in their lives.
Catherine
Hi Jeff,
I think I understand where you’re coming from with this message; having been in a Mastermind group for several years, I see it more as ‘enhancing’ myself.
‘Upgrading’ gives a person the mental image of having to get the newest and best model of something.
In terms of people, they could be perceived as inadequate.
As you say, long term relationships are important too and unless you’ve had to remove a toxic personality from your life, as you grow, so do they.
Thank you.
Paula A. Matthews
These are awesome tips to learn. As I try to better myself and grow my business, these tips will help me personally as well as professionally.
Thank you so much,
Paula
Diane
Hi Jeff- This is my first post to you. Thanks so much for adding to this world. And, thanks for being courageous enough to speak your truth…..What a great example for us all.
Maryalice
Absolutely agree, Jeff! We are all exceptional but very few have the slightest understanding of that (and I think that is by design by some powers that be). The good news is that the cat is out of the bag! It is my passion and purpose in life to help clear the mental and emotional trappings out of minds in order to upgrade. It is what I teach and train – it is Inner-life coaching, because that’s where it begins. I learned by life (and not the easy way), and also by the best of the best… It is never ending growth, and isn’t that beautiful? Thanks for the topic! It reminds me how grateful I am.
mike
It is What it is and it is what you make it. All good things come from good doings no matter what they are! happy trails to ALL!
Chuck Danes
Enjoyed your video Jeff as well as your last ones for the launch….enormously. You’re obviously a very genuine guy and a huge contributor when it comes to enhancing quality of life. I don’t necessarily consider such topics you’ve discussed here as being squeemish at all. Of course it is a matter of individual perspective, isn’t it? 🙂 Your perspective, genuineness, uniqueness and contribution are traits that a lot of people could model and definitely benefit from. The way you show up in the world obviously serves in enabling you and yours to experience a quality of life that you enjoy. I learned many years ago, that doesn’t happen by simply hoping and wishing or being one of “the lucky ones” but through contributing and providing value. Kudos and thanks for the value you do provide and the contribution you make.
John Arnold
A friend of mine and I call this “partnering up”. We look for people, monthly, who are doing what we want to do (but better) and then we connect and invest. And that’s it…connect, invest and keep the conversation alive.
I find many people are reluctant to ask gifted people for help. But many truly gifted people, love to help others with a shared passion, as long as they don’t feel like someone is just taking them for a ride. That’s why it’s so important to invest in the relationship. To give, give, and give, whether you see any return or not. And frankly, sometimes this can take years.
Lastly, while you’re asking, go for the gold. If you want to run a marathon, don’t just talk to anyone whose ran one. Find the man or woman who won last year, and call that person.
Blessings to you Jeff for another nugget of exceptional wisdom.
Rick
Jeff, your message on upgrading yourself comes right at a time when I’m moving in that direction myself, and renewing the original purpose of my business, which is to help my clients live more in their excellence. I work on taking them deeper into what it means to, as you said, become more magnetic. Thanks for confirming the message, and for the inspiration.
Rick
Jephias
Jeff, thank you so much for the excellent guidance will keep in touch need to start now to have my blog,
Ben Racz
Hey Jeff,
Awesome video, as usual.
And for all the people who are squeamish about it:
What Jeff just explained about this is probably just the single most important thing that a person can do to turn their lives around, especially if things are not going very well.
One of the things I always ask before I connect with someone is:
– What have they accomplished in their life?
– Are they successful in what they do, and are they really passionate about it?
– Are they happy about themselves, or do they spend their time complaining about others?
If they complain, for example, then that’s a good sign they aren’t happy about themselves… Which means if you connect with them and invest your time with them they WILL drag you down.
Well said, Jeff, and pay attention to that knee! I’ve been through that twice, and wouldn’t wish it on anyone.
Take care,
-Ben Racz
iris
Hi Jeff.
I’ve just started following you and I love your inspirational and energetic messages.
I completely agree, you are who you hang with. No controversy, no squeaming, just truth.
Iris
PS: I’m sure you’ve got a ton of friends but I’ll be your friend too 🙂
PSS: Do you facilitate mastermind groups?
Jeremy Flagg
Thanks for this reminder, Jeff! I was fortunate enough to see you speak at Experts Academy this past weekend and wanted to share how much I appreciated you sharing so much content with us so that we can be successful. You’re an inspiration to this transitioning stay-at-home-dad and I’m truly grateful for your leadership.
V Wells
Thanks for another great video. It’s like my mama always said, ‘You are judged by the company you keep.’
Elle Clouse
Same concept as not letting your kids be friends with bad influences except your an adult and make the choice yourself. I unconsciously did this a while ago and I’m noticing that I am making my goals now that I have friends with the same ambitions.
Bonnie Merring
Hi Jeff,
Enjoyed your video. Many positive comments and its true about the people we spend time with, makes a big difference in our lives. Thanks so much for your thoughts..
Scott
This is great advice… It’s not about the money. It’s about the happiness, support and “go-get-em” excitement people bring to your life. Wife gone and loving life so much more. Love ya work Jeff!
Raj
You’re an amazing guy, Jeff. Your positivity and enthusiasm shines thru this video. The message is beautiful and applies to all of us, and your warmth and positivity is just incredible.
No wonder you’re successful. More than anything, I’d like to emulate your positive spirit and I’m going to start by being a good listener to my friends. And before I upgrade my friends, I’d like to upgrade myself a bit.
france
i do love what you are saying Jeff. To be humble and to listen to the other seems to me the best way to find high relationships who are an opportunity to improve oneself. The web seems to me a great opportunity to make relationships of value, the books too..even from the last centuries..;-) , and the live events too which are a real opportunity to meet people, listen to them and express oneself in an authentic way. thanks Jeff, i love to hang out with you through your video and teaching..!!!
Roberta
I just discovered you and I really appreciate all that you do! You are becoming a true inspiration to me! 🙂
Mohamed Fayez
Hi Jeff,
What I like in your thoughts and presentations that they are to the point and very simple to understand. It is really striking to discover that easy ways but slow and sure, stacking over each other can build strong empires.
Rachel Denning
Thanks for a great reminder about something I knew, but haven’t been applying. Thanks again!!
Alejandro
Hello Jeff! Your video is amazing, thank you so much! I recently contacted two people exactly as you describe. They are very successful. In some way we became friends. But they have no time to meet with me alone. So I attend to their seminars and shows and find a chance to talk to them. One of them accepted to be interviewed in a video that I will share with our group and followers. I see that successful people have so many people around that it´s difficult to get them in your circle of friends. But it´s not impossible. Good post. I like it! Thank you again. Alejandro.
Phoebe Thomasson
Well you are one person sure worth knowing! What a fantastic presentation and very insightful guidance. It resonates with truth for me because it is currently working in my own life right now! Call it law of attraction, or sympathetic resonance, it doesn’t matter; what matters is this type of awareness expanding knowledge that helps us become conscious choosers of where and how we invest our energy; and who with!
Brilliant!
Thank you Jeff
🙂
Don
The tone and general ideas are great. But for me the mode is too establishment oriented. Beggars give me the opportunity to upgrade my generosity.What is success? Only about net dollar worth? I think that not only is upgrading myself about my relationships with other people, but also about my relationship with myself and also with nature.
Jeff Walker
@Don: hmmm… well if what you heard was that I was only talking about money or net worth, maybe you should watch the video again. Right from the very beginning (10 seconds in) I started talking about many other areas of success in life. Around the minute mark I named a few of them (physical well-being, relationships with community and friends, sprirituality).
And yes, I’ll agree – relationship with self is critically important. And relationship with nature plays a huge part in my life.
Pedar
Hi, Jeff, thanks for the invite.
It is always good to seek out other minds that have been sharpened in any discipline to which one attains. I appreciated your videos and plan to be around in 2014.
again, thanks,
pb
Kerry
Simplistic…you’re looking at symptoms not causes. We associate with people because of many factors…we may not be like them & we may think for ourselves, rather than be influenced by what they think, do, & value.
Debbie Harper
Hi Jeff, Enjoyed your video too. I like happy, motivated up beat people, “I’ve love the friends I have gathereds here on this thin raft” Jim Morrison.
Cecile
Hi Jeff,
thanks for sharing this with us. I’m so convinced about that, I have began shifting my mind and enlarging my relationships circle and i have so much fun doing that. You get to know great grea relationships circle. I just regret it took me so long to realize that but better late than never!
I’ve started showing up and finding ways to reach people and it’s actually easier than what I could imagine earlier because succesful people are usually open minded and qu
Cecile
sorry, I ended up clicking too fast…;)
I just wanted to say that the persons I get to meet are happy to share too; It’s just the beginning for me but I encourage everyone to do so, it’s a great way to learn and grow and live exiting moments.
Thank you again for the video
Cecile
Emily
Re #20. Remember the young sons of successful men of Kahlil Gibran’s time who pledged to support one another for life? – and one of them that ‘didn’t make it’ was still included and supported? A group like that … which calls for loyalty … is powerful.
If you don’t have successful people around you because you are poor or live in a dead town, self-improvement is done by associating with the best PART of the people around you, and reading every useful thing you can get your hands on. I read all the nonfiction books in a large Carnegie library growing up.
Develop a useful talent you already possess. With me, it was language (obviously). I became a court reporter (one chance in a hundred of graduating: statistics) and was on my way.
There is always a way, but it isn’t gift-wrapped.
Daisy Byrd
OMG Jeff!!!!
What you said is true about upgrading yourself. You are what you eat! You become who your friends are, nine time out of ten anyway. It’s a fact, that if you want to be successful you have to go where success is taking place, both physcially and mentally. Something I’m trying very hard to do. Thanks for the inspiration. Daisy Mae
Jean
Well said, and an excellent point about not leaving old friends behind but embracing new ones.
Mithu
I really like the stuff you do Jeff, and I’ve always felt that there is a law of attraction in that birds of a feather definitely flock together. I often try to explain to people in my professinoal life offering health advice , that if you are surrounding yourself with people who have poor health habits, your chances of breaking out of those habits yourselfare much less. But as you say, it sometimes comes across as ‘dump your friends, they’re dragging you down!’ – If you have any ideas on how to overcome that I’d be very interested to hear them. Keep up the excellent work, I wish you health, wealth and success!
Andrea
This was exactly what I needed to hear. I stumbled upon this Share by looking up a song called “upgrade yourself”. I look for inspiring messages through any culture. I agree that we are the 5 people you hang around with. And what has placed me in stagnation is that I work independently. And my boyfriend doesn’t make that much more than I do. So I need guidance on how & where to put myself in those places where I can hang aroubd those “exceptional people”. How do I make myself valuable to them? Thus has my wheels turning. Thank you & any suggestions or questions you have for me are greatly appreciated.
CarolGay
Thanks for the video, an AHA moment for me, being absolutely present for who you are communicating with is a GIFT, you are then often perceived to have presence or charisma, a lovely gift in return.
Quote – “It’s not who you are that holds you back, it’s who you think you’re not”
Katherine Peter
Hi Jeff, I share your belief that surrounding yourself with people you admire and wish to emulate (people who are successful, positive, talented, creative, energetic, healthy, socially and environmentally responsible) is key to achieving success in life and in business. I think that it’s all about raising your standards in every aspect of life. When high standards and high perfomance are the norm in your “circle” you naturally seek to grow as a person and aspire to live at that higher level – it’s like a “magnetic pull” to become an even better version of yourself.
Mary Jaksch | A-List Blogging
Lovely video, Jeff!
I find it important to be with friends and colleagues with whom I don’t have to keep on apologising of being an achiever.
And I must admit, I do tend to achieve – just through sticking at something. For example, after 20 years of karate practice I’m now a 4th degree Blackbelt. It doesn’t mean I’m special, I just happen to be tenacious.
I don’t necessarily think we need particular friends to ‘upgrade’ us. But we do need friends who want us to achieve.
It’s like being a bird about to take flight. We need space to flap our wings so that we can soar.
Good friends like to see us take wing.
Kathy Strong
Hi Jeff,
When I grow up, I want to be just like you If you were my friend, I would be so honoured. I follow everything you do and I wish I could purchase everything you sell. In time, once I upgrade myself I will be able to. Just stepping up from 4 years of determined recovery following serious attack and back building my business. This is something I do know about but not quite in this way. I love that you hold onto your dear friends. When I first heard this in 1994 at Mastery University, I was astonished to see husbands leave wives and vice versa, best friends suddenly parting company and honestly, I wanted nothing to do with that. Years later, I can see the wisdom of adding unique and exceptional people to your life. You, my friend, are one of those very special people in my life. Over the years, I have added many others like you but have never thought to perceive them as being part of my circle of friends -over – polite I think and reluctant to ask them to be my friend. I have now asked you so I have taken the first step. Look forward to getting to know you and introduce you to my extended circle of friends (students) of mine. I consider you one of my trusted advisers. Thank you Jeff for being so giving. Kathy X
Richard Sleigh
Great message! Here are a two ways to expand on the idea of hanging out with great people: 1. immerse yourself in great books, audios, videos. This sets you up for the times when you meet great people in person. 2. Napoleon Hill talked about having an imaginary mastermind group of people – he would have meetings in his mind with great people who are no longer living (but people he studied) and listen to them comment on his plans or give him advice. I’ve had imaginary mastermind meetings with combinations of people I have studied like Ben Franklin, John Lennon, Rich Schefren (yeah i know, he’s alive…) Thomas Edison, Matt Furey, Mark Twain… I get a lot of surprise answers and insights this way… I think it goes beyond imagination to some form of timeless telepathic communication. On the other hand, maybe I am just a nut case -whatever – seems to work for me…
Jeff Walker
@Richard: great point about immersing yourself in great books and learning. That section in “Think and Grow Rich” has always stuck with me… it was probably the most memorable section in the entire book for me.
Chris Downs
Thank you Jeff! I love what you shared. It also brings to light the opportunity to befriend those who are becoming amazing people and just hang out with you!!!
Thank you for being totally Awesome! I know that you just can’t help it, because that is how God Created you, in HIS Image!!!
PollyAnna
Hello, Jeff! I’m right on board with you! Your circle is so important. We often overlook the impact those around us have because we live in an individualized, competitive based society versus a cooperative, collaborative based society (although, I think that’s shifting a bit). We pick up so much from our peers, and it’s important to be vigilant of our own stuff so we know how we’re interacting with others. Such a great topic, and as a side note, it’s not wrong to want to always be better and surround yourself with people whom inspire you. The people that inspire us are the ones we keep around 🙂 Plus, sometimes a social overhaul is needed 😉
Thank you so much again, and much love!
Big Nonlocal Quantum Hugs,
PollyAnna 🙂
Jade Campbell
Jeff,
Just loved it , your warmth and honesty, no one could misconstrue your message .
Gotta Laugh – Was feeling all warm and fuzzy, until read the comment below about laying about with dogs and getting up with fleas – it’s midnight here and I woke hubby at the other end of the house with my laughter . .!
Always a pleasure to receive your content – and your commentators!!
Frederic
Thanks again for this video Jeff, There may be some truth in what you are saying about hanging with amazing people but I also think that by focusing on being a better person, trying to inspire people in some ways will also attract great people and great things around you. It’s a matter to decide what kind of life we want to have and what kind of person we wanna be. Funny enough but when we tend to get better and more confident, we surely attract people but there is also a natural selection the other way around, people who are way to negative and stuck in their problems will either run away from you or be inspired by you! included very close friends or family members. Anyone can attract success, it is unrelated to education, beauty or money, it’s first a matter of willpower and motivation.
Cubie King
Jeff: this is my first time writing, but I’ve followed you for some time. In a nutshell I believe what you are conveying is simply this; people don’t care how much you know, until they know how much you really care. I worked for a Fortune 100 financial services company for 10 years and the CEO was an incredible leader, who use to say all the time that “people can smell a phony a mile away. I bought a launch course from another “guru,” and I was so very disappointed because I honestly didn’t get the felling that this guy really cared if I succeeded or not- it seemed to be all about how much money he was making. You won me over as the genuine article- when I watched your video talking about how you were literally broke and your wife came home crying and asked if you could do something to bring money into the household. Jeff, I truly get the feeling that YOU REALLY DO CARE about your students. In a day like this, with so many people promising one thing, but delivering something entirely different, I want to say a simple -THANK YOU! I hope to meet you one day!
mark grove
That was beautiful Jeff! Some very insightful statements on how to help others more successful than you and develop relationships that are giving both ways. And not just financially. I truly believe even though you may have friends who make very little money, they can teach you something, but we should always strive to create value for others and do better in our own lives. If we don’t do better we can’t help others.
Thanks Jeff.
Max_G
Jim Rohn theorem… while an appealing one it’s also a difficult one, chicken or egg… Suppose you have these ‘underwhelming’ people around you. How did they get there in the first place? Why did you attract them? Why are they attracted to you?
Imho, expecting change in a passive way by just changing company won’t work. You should at least 1. Be aware of what people you are looking for and why, and 2. Start modelling them for quite some time. And pray they will accept your probably slightly artificial behaviour…
I think, if you decide you want change, YOU must change in the first place. Not only in thoughts or hope, but in your actions. The people who fit in your new identity will appear automatically.
Rita Mailheau
Jeff.
It’s interesting that you mention this. Years ago I started on the path to a better relationship with God. While I was preparing to take a class on how to read the Bible, one of the coordinators gave me a piece of advice.
To put this in context, she was a professional dancer at the top of her game. She was elegant, smart, and generous. She had a Broadway career and appeared in the original production of Evita.
Her advice: choose your friends wisely. I didn’t see any problem with my friends at the time, but I’ve since discovered what she meant.
So much of our success is a direct result of having a positive mental attitude. And, attitude can be highly contagious. When we’re around people who downtalk and fling out negatives all of the time, the result will be a hampering of our own progress. The reverse is also true. Why not spend time with people who see the possibilities and make action their habit.
THANKS!
I purchased your book and I’m really looking forward to reading it.
Rita Mailheau | San Diego Tech and Business Copywriter
Kathleen
Hi Jeff, I suspect that this was not the easiest advice you have presented to your audience but I sense you felt it was very important for you to express. Yes, it is a fine line that must be tread in choosing our friends and associates but as we grow in the confidence of mastering our own lives, we become more self-assured which then radiates out to others making them want to know us better. I am working on the internal aspect of transformation which includes starting up an online business that will afford me the lifestyle I dream of as well as the ability to inspire, nurture, and support those coming after me. I am 72 years young so I want to emphasize that this is a life-long quest for those who want to excel. Thanks for your good wishes and sage advice.
Patricia Gunnison
Jeff,
Thanks so much for excellent information. Great advice, Jeff!
Thanks again, Jeff,
Patricia Gunnison
Jacob Bear
Great advice, Jeff. I’ve been thinking about this issue a lot lately, because I’ve been thrown into a leadership position at work because most of my colleagues don’t feel like they’re able to handle a big challenge that has come our way. I wondered if they would drag me down, but instead I’m trying to raise them up. I think you really nailed it when you said we’re all exceptional and extraordinary. You can “raise the average” by bringing out the extraordinary traits of the people you’re closest to. In fact, most of my best friends have done this for me. Anyway, thanks for another provocative, encouraging, and inspiring video. I can’t wait to read your book!
Cathal
Jeff,
You talk about giving value and being present to people.
All marketers talk about giving value but very few that I know walk the walk.
You certainly walk the walk!
This is a very valuable video, many thanks for sharing it.
As for being present to people, listening to what they say, knowing their name and paying attention to their story. Very few things can make someone feel more valued than that.
Brilliant advice!
Paul Spence
What an honest but thought proving in hand inspirational 5 and a half minutes. Thanks for this Jeff very encouraging
Take care
Paul
Betty Ann Peters
I love your content and I’m looking forward to receiving your new book. It is so true and I think the first step is awareness of the fact and as you work on yourself you will be attracting the kind of people that will have the income bracket that you desire. Thanks again I love your stuff!
Sammy Taggett
It sure is hard to leave friends that do not serve you. I think you made a huge point when you pick up your phone and see who’s calling you and who you are calling. Are you talking with exceptional people on a daily basis.
Create value for the people you really want to surround yourself with….
Nail-Head-Hammer-BAM!!! You are the man Jeff thanks for this.
Here’s to building value and making you someone that I find on my caller ID someday!
Heather Fraser Fawcett
I believe we can widen our circle of acquaintances and friends without feeling guilty or squeamish about it. Great talk, Jeff!
Jonathan Pierce
I like to meet inspiring people but very often they’re not gurus. they’re the parents of children with disabilities, they’re volunteers who give up their Friday nights to run church youth programmes, they’re the folks who are sacrificially looking after their elderly parents and putting others before themselves. They rock and i’m blessed to know many such people
Rennie Gabriel
Hi Jeff,
It’s a pleasure to listen to your words of wisdom. I’ve done what you’ve said and it works. What I need to do now is smile more when I speak. It makes me happy to watch you.
Maria Breakwood Swap
Your a good soul Jeff Walker!!!!
Sarah Hutchinson
I’m a yogi, and we have a phrase “You are the company you keep.” This obviously includes those we spend time with, and on a more subtle level includes the company of our thoughts, food, media etc. It’s totally true: we vibe with what is around us, so choose your vibe and find dance partners!
Emily
And if you are stuck in the hinterlands with the cavemen-and-women where no mental or spiritual life exists, you are still who you associate with through print and through associating with the best part of each of the locals. Humor is a great way to stretch others. A spiritual life can be had with spiritual beings.
Emily Rose
Jeff, this is so inspiring. Thank you so much for the reminder! As I look back, I see myself upleveling who I hang around, and as I move forward, I notice myself attracted to people operating at a high-level of success, passion, business, and integrity. Such great a reflection. Thank you!
Betty
Love what you have to say and I must say that I agree wholeheartedly! I have long-standing relationships that I treasure beyond measure and yet there are some new people who have energized me and brought me into a new way of living that’s exciting and engaging and have me where I can barely catch my proverbial breath! It’s amazing! And I love hearing you talk, can’t wait for your book! Thanks!
Andrea Samadi
100% correct, Jeff Walker! So much so, that I included this topic in my Jumpstart to Success Program for schools. Greg Link,Co-founder and President, CoveyLink Worldwide and co-author of Smart Trust says it so well in this quick piece he filmed for me to help get teens on the right path. This concept needs to start at a young age.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G_z_d6iBdfw You are who you hang out with!!
Thanks for all you do!
Larry Capra
Upgrade: Increased levels of personal capability through learning. Increased levels of personal responsibility, along with respect for others. Increased levels of personal reward, both material and intangible. It’s natures way.
Have at it folks.
Jayme Kopke
Great piece of advice, Jeff. I’ve been hearing the same repeated in podcast after podacast by Dan Sullivan, who you follow too, and I certainly agree with it. But the authenticity and warmth with which you deliver it on this video makes it even more believable. This says something about the power of video as a way to publish, and it says something about you too. Thank you.
Celeste Davis
All so true…and God showed me a few years ago to look at the common factors among my inner circle…what was the common trait? Then he showed me that common was a trait I was attracting. Wasn’t a pretty site! That knowledge helped me to make some radical inner changes…and those relationships fell by the wayside that were not uplifting to any of us.
Nico
Jeff,
GREAT post. I agree with the previous comments that your body language is great in this video, your smile, everything, right up till the last (and possibly most important for you) part – the ask for “Like” and other social interaction. You inadvertently Ask for the Like while shaking your head “No”. Like it or not (pun intended), this is a mixed signal. Try asking with an affirmative head nod (or none) in the next video. I’d be curious to know whether it makes a real difference.
Just thought I’d point it out. I Liked anyway.
No need to post the comment – just thought I’d share with you. Thank you for edifying the public with your positive and encouraging message brother.
Nico Johnson
Jeff Walker
@Nico: thanks for the feedback… I posted it so others could learn. I haven’t studied NLP, but I’m always a student first.
Travis
Thanks for including this, Jeff. I’m laying out my plc content and really appreciate these finer points to nailing the videos. You do a terrific job at this….being authentic. How much has it evolved since you started? Key drivers or discoveries?
Tara Moore
Hi Jeff!
This is great and always a good reminder. It’s never easy to look at this topic simply due to what you mentioned, however, its true and it maked a difference. What I’m taking from this video is to constantly look at how I can create value and become even more magnetic as I grow. Thanks for all of your coaching and support through this process. I’m truly grateful for what I have learned thus far!
Debbie Cooper
I have enjoyed what I’ve heard thus far, I have always heard it said to hang around the kind,type of people you would like to be like.
Trisha Keel
You’re right about being an average of the 5 people you spend the most time with. I don’t know so much about the money, but I do know about the overall impact on you. BIG thing to consider, if you are at the top level of your group, who will lift YOU up? Seek at add at least one person to your circle who challenges you, sets an example for you, and reaches back to help you be more than you already are (as you continue to help all the others). If you are the top of the chain, you cannot grow further. That’s when the seminars get to be so very important to attend, because there you will meet like-minded folks of many levels. Go. Reach out. Watch how your life changes.
Glauber Couto
Great tip Jeff. I think another thing should be added if you want to upgrade yourself is change your mindset. Always seek for self-improvement and you are going to see some good changes soon.
rei home
Right now it looks like Expression Engine is the preferred
blogging platform available right now. (from what I’ve read) Is that what you are using on your
blog?
Irina
If you stay true to upgrading _yourself_ as in: “I want to be like them” and not “I want to have what they have” (which is a huge difference, I think) it cannot be mercenary, because you actually like those people you try to be close to. And I think “amazing” does not have to be about financial success either. My best friend, who continues to be a source of inspiration to me, had one of the worst starts imaginable for someone born in my time and area. I met her a short while after she emancipated from her abusive family, and have known her for a decade now, and she never stops to astonish me.
I have a higher income, less debt and a more healthy and taken-care-of body than she has and I do have a healthy relationship, where she is single. But I started from a much “higher” point, after all the loving I received. Since I’ve known her she never stopped her way “upwards”, to happiness, to financial security, to healthy, non abusive relation-/ friendships, even if she had to crawl. She never turned bitter, she is friendly, polite, helpful, with a great sense of humor, learned to set boundaries (not something that was easy for her) without hurting people in the process. If she is depressed, she admits it and gets help. But she refuses to call it “depression”, when she is just tired, annoyed or angry. It’s not her allround excuse for everything, and her bouts don’t define her.
I learned how-to-get-up-again and stay friendly much better from her than from most people with more “obvious” social or economical success.
Jeff once said: we need to know for whom we want to be a hero.
I want to be a hero for a person like her.
She is not a guru, and probably never will be. But she will be content, happy and exactly where she wants to be.
She hadn’t all the opportunities others had. But those she had, she used brilliantly, even if she was scared.
That’s amzing for me.
Preston Rentz
Jeff, I’m in the process of creating a mastermind group. I look forward to creating an upward mobility in my relationships with others and being in the position to help others to reach higher. Excellent video! I look forward to more.
Mark Westcott
Geoff, fantastic video. Great wisdom and so simple. Hang out where you want to live!
Travis
Funny, just shared this today with a young man headed to college this Friday. I don’t use it relative to income, so much as overall behavior and success…including character, happiness, and fulfillment.
Regarding exceptionalism…I don’t think this “law” breaks down under criticism of exceptionalism. It doesn’t say you can’t hang out with or love on someone who is struggling or whose habits are a wreck. It’s fine to be close with them…just be aware that you need someone whose performance, behaviors, character is aspirational to you.
I’ve enjoyed coming into your tribe thru Launch (book) – thank you!
Susannah Usovo
So true Jeff!
I look at the circle of friends now that I am in a happy place in my heart and its soooo good. All good things hace come about because of those steps I took a few years back….in retrospect they were difficult, however they were the very best steps I took…..I am now surrounded by a very influential and inspiring circle of friends who think and feel and do the same as me!
This year my first book was published…many many wonderful things have happened now in relation to my russian kin and ancestors, as they say,….onwards and upwards!
Aloha!
geri
Jeff, You’re so inspirational and such an enthusiastic blessing. Funny, last Sunday (and this is exactly what you said to do) when I walked into the cafe in our church lobby,(fellowship before service) a small group of 4 ladies were standing here and had smiles from ear to ear.One said guess who’s here ?! I love being around her; she’s so fun to be with!” Another said “I love her joy!” I do feel like I am magnetic. I play guitar and write songs and love Jesus with all my heart. I am a writer (journaling dreams and visions and daily inputs of what God shows me in devotionals and books I read) and songwriter of many subjects as they come to my heart; mostly about God in some way though. Thanksgiving was blessing; as a family invited me to dinner, along with a handful of folks who had no one to share the day with. Dinner was grand and I led a sing-a-long of hymns and choruses and Betty’s favorite I wrote called “Stinkin’ Thinkin’. We had a wonderful time and laughed a lot; and even recorded the meal and sing-a-long to give a copy to the host and hostess. What a blessing to be a blessing to others. Turns out Betty’s mother’s favorite song was one we picked out to sing. She asked for a copy of the tape too; her mom is gone. God is good. (Single, content, but looking. 🙂 )
Pat
Interesting. Since I read so much of your work, watch so many of your videos and attribute so much of what I have achieved lately to you—I think you’re one of my five best friends Jeff. Thanks.
Pat
Charles
Hey Jeff, what to say ? Basic and simple concepts can drive our acts so to improve our attitude to understand and absorb all the positive energy which is always around us. Point is…. very often we don’t know that, so we need a very important, caring and smart friend ready to guide us, to enlighten us. Thanks to exist !
Charles
Joyce Kawasaki
Hi Jeff,
Thanks for your refreshing presence! I also enjoyed this key topic of how the average of the top 5-10 people we most hang around with determines who we become. I loved how you added that we should not throw out our lifelong friends but we can add new friends at a higher level of development in life, whether it be in spirituality, finances, health or love. I too am looking forward to how one can form and maintain a mastermind group that includes accountability without being too stiff or rigid about it. I am grateful for your presence in my life.
Joyce
Rama
Aloha and thanks Jeff! Couldn’t agree more about the importance of keeping good company…and being a high caliber person yourself. Rock on with your bad self! ;o)
Margaret
Agreed, but how and where to find these people…that is the challenge.
Derek C Howie
Love It Love It.. The Good Life New Zealand Bay Of Plenty.. We Are In The Business Of Giving.. To This End Our Partners.. The Institute Of HeartMath There Paper The Appreciative Heat.. Simply Wonderful.. Trust You Will Accept My Shout To Join Us.. Pam Hendrickson Kathrin Florino Jeff Walker.. Yours In Service Derek C Howie Take Care out.
Rob
Hi Jeff,
I totally agree and would add as I’m very sure others have to that its not so much being friends with people that does this but the way they think and act rubs off on the way you perform your days, aspirations you have and belief in what is possible for you to achieve.
I don’t have any friends currently.. But am immersing myself in the knowledge of others that are much more successful monetarily speaking that is. So i can let the amazing power of unconscious thought carry me far enough forward so i can meet the people i need to progress further.
Some might say that the people you follow on the internet also have this effect on you.
I very much appreciate hearing your positive, spiritual angle on the changes to peoples lives you make and the continued evolution of global culture! I aspire to this great outcome too!
Many thanks,
Rob M
Andrew
I was born in Europe and one of the most common sayings that I heard since I was very young
is that “you become like the friends you associate with” . I always believed it to be true therefore
I consider your video to be true and right on target.
Denis Moore
I agree with the charisma,(Charisma is about giving from you innermost essence) You have the power to influence the energy in every place you go. The relationships is not just about human relationships it is all about your relationships to life, nature, the planet and the universe. The perceived success you are talking about might be a business ideal of exceptionalism but it is not necessarily improving who you are in our world. Infact I would say it is the opposite. Up grading is a perception of higher and lower and monetary wealth being higher than those who do not have it. This is a big mistake in perception. Giving and receiving is how you achieve these improved states of being and not by increasing you bank balance. That is a taking concept and a hording concept all of which upset the natural balances of our world we are driving it to extinction because of taking too much.
The reason why I find it almost impossible to sell the wisdom I have acquired is just that. If we continue to take and not to constantly give back to the natural life force of this planet we will be extinct in a short period of time. We have to be very careful about what we teach other and our children because it is those seeds of though that will lead either to abundant happy healthy life or extinction.
Gus Booth
Soooooo much of your advice is so Biblical…..”bad company corrupts good character.” THX!!
Chris Glubish
I understand and of course agree with the general premise here. Surrounding yourself with people that elevate your entire life is a good strategy for success in career, health and spirituality. But having this as a means to an end is a dangerously slippery slope and one that may lead to short term success but won’t (necessarily) lead to contentment. CS Lewis has an excellent speech about this, entitled “The Futility of the Inner Circle” where he argues that inner circles and cliques inevitably form and fade through seasons of your life and chasing them will eventually break your heart. Great read http://www.lewissociety.org/innerring.php
I am sure you’d advocate balance. Chase authentic relationships that matter. But I don’t know if you can make this happen without a hallow self serving motive driving everything. I’d suggest that most people are incapable of walking the fine line. If your primary goal in life is to advanced your income into a new bracket perhaps it is OK to run all of your relationships through a filter called “what can this person do for me” and the mask it in acts of service aimed at ‘getting in’. But I really think these sorts of authentic relationships have to happen organically and that is something you can’t set out as a goal or an item on you to do list without corrupting the process.
Cheers,
Chris Glubish
Raúl
Great to remember this lesson, it’s very cool how the world works, let me explain.
I am in a point in my carreer that everything is working out the way I wanted it, I’m making money, growing my business, working with amazing people, finding time to do what I love, and, of course, I am feeling a bit down.
Why?
Because I’ve tested the things I love and I’m not having enough of them, but, the thing is, I can’t fully commit to them because those activities are not bringing money (just yet) (those activities are launches, digital products, copywriting)
So, I’m looking for a way to get through with this and I talk to my aunt (who is kind of like a mother to me and she tells me:
Your problem is that you are not being organized, you are just doing, not planning, you are getting, not focusing.
That got to me like a thunderbolt, she was right and someone told me that thing before, the guy who says:
Your future is defined by your peer group.
I am talking about the man, the great, the one and only: Tony Robbins.
I have his TIme of your life training, I haven’t finished it, but, the first days I did changed my life, so, here you are, giving me an awesome piece of advice, and, in the same time remembering me: You need to go to the basics, you must focus on strengthen the basics.
Carl Jung calls it sincronicity, it’s magical, and it exists.
Best regards Jeff!!
KG
Thanks Jeff, this is the repeated message the universe keeps sending me. Hope to connect in person with you sometime.
eryn
80% of my time is spent with children.
Mike
A really interesting concept that does have some value to it. Everyone has an unseen energy force and being around strong, positive, caring, enthusiastic healthy energies affects us invisible. Also certain people inspire us to be better and to do better. Very many of my old bosses (Jim Henson, John Lasseter, Steve Jobs and George Lucas) had that quality. Being around them gets you thinking differently, opening your mind to new possibilities.
Conversely being around someone who is always complaining and miserable can really bring your day down quickly and they can suck the life out of you. So I would say it works at both ends of the spectrum.
Thank you Jeff for the many things you share that offer positive help and value, a huge amount which is free!
Eti Refaeli
Dear Jeff,
This is so great, I love what you do and your book (I’m in the middle of the book).
Thank you Jeff
Eti Refaeli
Shrinking women
Sharon
It is exactly what crossed my mind several times lately!
Thanks for bringing it up.
Victor
Cool, amazing video. I am looking forward to being more charismatic and to forge great relationship that upgrades you.
Rob
And another thing that occurred to me… Malcolm Gladwell makes the point about similar performing students, those at ivy-league universities & the others at less prestigious ones. Although achieving similar grades, the students at the top universities compare themselves to the elite students & drop out, considering themselves as failures. Meanwhile, those at less acclaimed universities become high achievers because their almost identical performance puts them towards the top of the class…
Juan Prado
Thanks Jeff por this reflection. It is exactly what I need in this moment of my life.
Rodney C. Davis
Hi Jeff. I’m going to take this as an invitation to come join one of your offerings, mastermind group or something. I’m ready! No more wishful thinking or nibbling at the edges. Can’t wait to get started. Is there a place where I can see at a glance what your product/activity cycles are? I need to work your stuff into my schedules for the upcoming months.
Len Woods
Jeff…great reminder to BE PRESENT. I needed to hear that. It is so easy to be hung in the past or focused on the future that we miss the present. It’s also possible to be with people, and not really be “with” them. I don’t know that the skill of “being present” = “charisma,” but it’s attractive and engaging and extremely rare. Good stuff. Thanks!
Miriam
Jeff, did you know you are quoting scripture; Proverbs 13:20 says, “He who walks with the wise, becomes wise, but the champion of fools will suffer harm.” I have already made a goal for 2016 to,hang out with women who are making 6 figures. I believe your message, it is truth. Have a great day!
Dede Thies
SO TRUE, Jeff! THANKS!
I have this “Fake It Til You Make It” theme I am constantly impressing on my kids. When they are down about sports, friends, attitude… what have you; this is exactly what I have been trying to say to them!
My personal example: About 8 or so years ago, I noticed I was becoming incredibly cynical and negative regarding MANY areas of my life. Someone approached me with a similar message you have here. I immediately sought out the most joyful person that I have ever met. She literally oozed out happiness and contentment. Unfortunately, we were little more than strangers. I simply asked her to hang out one day. Immediately, we became friends. Now, 8 years later, she is one of my very best friends. Many of her friends and family are my closest relationships even today! I credit her ALL the time with creating in a me a better wife, mother, friend and daughter!! This idea really and truly works!
Thanks for passing this message on!
Leo Naves
I like that, and I try to introduce myself, like you wrote in BluePrint. How I’m not in my mother country, I doing in FB, G+, Twitter, email, only on line because in the moment it’s my way that I can use. This way is hard, I’m Photographer and I need relationships with the real people next to me, like the same city or state, but I’ll do this way. I hope and want to win. Thank you for all easy way to success.
I’ll win.
bloomphd
True. What happens when you upgrade your habits is that you encounter people with those same habits. You go to the gym, and your friends don’t do that, consequently, you begin to spend more time with people who go to the gym. Logical outcome. You stop watching TV and read more, so you spend more time at the library and at the book store. You then meet people who have more interest in that. You begin to focus on your time management and bring more discipline into your life, and it conflicts with the schedule of friends who do not want to endure that discipline. In the end, one does not desert their friends, but you come to a junction where you go one way, and they decide they don’t wish to go with you. If you are lucky you can bring a few with you, but people make their own choices about life, and some decide that if it means changing to keep you in their circle of friends they would rather not change. So, you have to change back to stay in their circle, or follow your own path and stay in contact as best you can, if they will accept that. It comes down to living your own life and making your own choices. Hopefully the choices you make are high road choices.
Richard
I totally agree. This is something that I have started implementing into my life already. Watching your video was confirmation of the changes I need to make.
Mary
Jeff,
Loved this – definitely a golden nugget of advice to help your readers in their quest for self-improvement and success. As a big fan of your Product Launch Formula book, just wanted to say thanks for taking the time to make these videos. I’m on many people’s lists and may or may not open them, but I definitely enjoy hearing what you have to say – so keep pushing us, and keep up the great work! 🙂
KG
Hi. I agree with everything you said. is it possible at 50 to start again? I look at around at my best friends, and none of them are doing really well. And not well enough for me to go to for advice. Going through a terrible divorce I find myself having to basically rebuild a life. Where do you find the new group of people? And would successful people want to hang out with someone starting from scratch who doesn’t have much to offer?
Laura Greenwald
Hi KG,
First off 50 is nothing more than a number. It only means you’re at the halfway point in your life! So use this as an opportunity to completely reboot everything about yourself that you want to change. I would try LinkedIn to meet new business minded/success minded people. And don’t just stop at connecting with people. You can also used LinkedIn to connect with groups, some of which will be in your area. If they have any meetings or events — do something radical, like actually show up! Make 2015 your year. Blessings to you on your new journey. Laura
frank clemente
Great Upgrading video. What I found is that every person emits a tone, a color or radiant light that emanates from them
-from each cell. Everyone does this knowingly or unknowingly. Some call it magnetism, others, attraction, others vibrations.
What I believe you are saying is to associate and give value to those people whose emanations, vibrations vibrate generosity, service, integrity, peace of mind while providing an empowering service to others. Leadership is included. As you speak on the videos, I believe you are releasing these emanations which uplift others to expand the power within. Not to be overcome by circumstances that degrade the self. Associate with those who help you upgrade yourself. lead you to the path of mastery and power so each of us can be better and contribute to raising of others along the way. It’s not about forsaking those that you know who are part of one’s circle but to arise vertically in awareness and service. All this leads to abundance Thanks again Frank C
deborah Smith
Jeff
Thanks for putting all your stuff out, I heard you on I love Marketing, got your book and am getting ready to launch. You are so right about having the right people around you. Its more than just money, those with vision and passion will spur you on while dream stealers and nay sayers will drag you down. Be Bold with the Bold, rather that frightened with the frightened
Bonnie
Very well said Jeff! I love that you talk about growing yourself that’s so key in “upgrading” your circle. You made a difficult topic very friendly and doable. I’m new to you blog and considering this post, I’ll be staying. Looking forward to hearing more.
Eric
Hey Jeff! Great insight as always. I’m definitely in the process of upgrading right. I’ve just recently learned your your formula and I’m going to give the product launch sequence a shot with the recent ebook I just completed. Thanks for coming up with such an awesome system and I’ll let you know how it goes. I hope I generate enough success that I can someday be a part of your platinum crew. Sounds like a great bunch of folks. Congrats on all your success.
Igor
Hi Jeff!
Thanks for wise advices and tips.
May be 2015 is a great year to find reasons to upgrade yourself!
Good luck.
Igor
Charles Emmanuel
Wow! Jeff, you certainly hit the nail on the head here. No one can really be better than the quality of their associations. in fact, there is a saying “show me your friends and i will tell you who you are” but i like to modify it to read “show me your friends and i will show you your future”
Thanks for the video.
Janette
That’s great Jeff! But I feel like I need to change my personality! I can certainly see the benefit in what you are saying though 🙂
Daniel Ulin
Exceptional stuff, Jeff. There are a number of important takeaways for me here — particularly your thought about being present and in the moment with others. I can’t remember where I first heard it, but the basic thought is this: we human beings are memory-making creatures. Yes, the money and the houses and the “stuff” is great, but basically, we’re here to create lasting, positive, impactful experiences and memories for ourselves and others. So thank you so much for this; it’s exactly what I needed to hear today.
Maegan
I totally agree with this and when I wanted to “up-level” myself/business/clients/etc, I not only sought to interact more with people on the level where I wanted to be IRL, but online as well. Where do I get my info? What influencers am I listening and paying attention to?
That has made a huge difference for me and my mindset. 🙂 Thanks for the great vlogs! Party On!
Diane
Hi Jeff,
I like your message and am using your book. I have been working with this for a while and continue to be conscious about who I”m choosing to spend time with. So, I’ll be in Durango in a couple months, want to go ride the Hermosa Creek trail with me?
Thanks!
Diane
Arnold Stolting (Stolting Media Group)
“Most Peoples Lives Are Direct Reflection Of The Expectations Of Their Peer Group!” – Tony Robbins.
I believe that if your peer group in your immediate surroundings mostly spend their life doing average things such as go to work at a 9/5 job, live paycheck to paycheck, pay their bills, and hang out at the pub almost every weekend discussing all their miseries over a pint, then it almost becomes not necessary to strive for any greater for yourself.
This is because these people do not have any higher expectations for themselves, therefore they really wouldn’t have any higher expectations of you, and you won’t feel any immediate urge to do anything more than what they are doing. You may even find yourself dumbing down your goals and ambitions somewhat, just so that you can remain a good fit in this circle of friends, or you just end up making so much time for them, that you don’t have any time left to pursue your bigger dreams, even if you wanted to.
But if you find yourself amongst a peer group that has a higher set of standards, and they are entrepreneurial minded and always strive to make the most of their time by aiming for, and accomplishing extraordinary things, and they live an awesome lifestyle that may include lots of traveling, or anything that we would consider a great life, if you hang with these types of people, you may find yourself automatically striving for more as well, and you will set higher standards for yourself, because simply talking about how you were able to pay your next bill would not be a good story that will impress them.
Personally I think it’s very important that if you have bigger goals, ambitions, and want to raise your standards for yourself, it then becomes very important that you choose your environment and the people you hang with very wisely. This way you will always be aiming for more, and you would also have open minded people around you to present your new big business idea to, without receiving either blank stares, or negative close minded “stop dreaming” responses.
Bruce Hanson
Great insight. And, it’s what we tell our children EVERY SINGLE DAY. You are who you hang out with!
KellyB
I never noticed this until you pointed this out, but I ABSOLUTELY feel the difference when I’m around the “upgraded” type of friends.
With my “average” peers, I am comfortable but with the others, I am more confident, have that” I can do that too” attitude. Ideas, support, & interests are of a different variety and so helpful with my business life. Thanx for making this so much clearer & keep up the good work!
David H. Paul
Hi Jeff, and Thank You for the wonderful reminder of upgrading.
This one idea has sparked an amazing idea for me that will not only help me and my nonprofit grow but will also help reach millions more of the people we intend to serve. This week, NSDF is beginning the creation of a Mastermind of Nonprofits serving the world Epilepsy/Seizure Disorders Community (65 million+ strong), creating a massive opportunity for positive change growth and difference making worldwide.
To Your Peace and Prosperity,
David
AL
Yeah well its all true. They say work-out with folks who are stronger, or play guitar with a better player. Its like business, find a mentor. Thank you “Napolean Carnegie”!
Cirsten Eggers
Thank you for yet another great video
Susan Levin
The word “upgrade” does have a yucky connotation, like old cars being swapped out for newer ones, and people sure ain’t cars. But sometimes it’s just time to recognize when something is either not working any more (like an old car or old relationship), or when you just want ANOTHER newer version IN ADDITION to your old ones (relationships or cars!). I like the idea of a limitless garage – lots of cars, lots of great folks, big life.
I find, personally, that as I’m making choices that are self-caring (which is a bit different than selfish, though sometimes it feels like I’m being selfish, which is an old belief), I am indeed drawing stronger, brighter, more positive, and more truly awesome people into my life. I just love being around great people, learning from them, and trying to share my gifts with them as well. Thanks Jeff! Great food for thought.
Jim
Charlie “Tremendous” Jones once said, “Where you are 10 years from now will be based upon the books you read and the people you associate with.” Of course that was before the advent of the internet and other social media outlets, etc.
thia/Basilia
Jeff, you are a breath of fresh air! You are so right! Only one glitch–how long? I am 76 walking on my 77. I have now found out that I am and always have been SUCCESSFUL! No kidding! But why did I spent so much time chasing after success? Out of ignorance! Ignorance? Yes, I ignored the fact that we have an enemy in the spiritual sphere. This enemy has programmed us to be our own god in spite of the Ten Commandments.
Because of this programming, we have all chosen to believe whatever seems right or good to us. In addition, we have all formed a concept about our Creator in our minds. This concept is slightly different from one group of people to another. Therefore, all the religions in the world, three of them, predominant–Christian, Jewish & Muslim.
Alright, each concept of our Creator is not at all what our Creator really is. For no human mind can conceive the immensity of our Creator, period! This is, actually, the core of our problem with everything under the sun including our relationships.
Furthermore, this is something that is only now coming to the surface. Why? Because of our Creator’s timing! Nothing, absolutely nothing happens in the whole Universe outside of our Creator’s timing! So what is my point?
Well, not my point or opinion at all! Only my observation! Take for instances this moment of time. Why did I find you or rather why did I decided to watch your video? No brainer, out of curiosity. Am I looking to upgrade or update myself? Nay! Only upgrading the first volume of a series that should upgrade many souls! Why? And really, this is not propaganda at all! But, my observation: the timing for your title and what I am doing with the series I am putting together titled, Reality: Dying In The Present! Living In Eternity!
Why or how have I come up with such title and why the watching of your video? Timing again, our Creator’s timing! Until one dies in the present or until one lose one’s present or lower life, one cannot find the higher or eternal life! My reality: I have lost my lower life and I now live in eternity even when I am very human–a fun, lovely and loved human at that!
Anyhow, maybe, just maybe if and when you click the site above mentioned, we can build us that coveted relationship! How about that for an invitation to a successful one!
The best comment I read here so far is the one that says something like this, ‘If you hung around with dogs you windup with fleas! I like to add the opposite concerning my invitation, ‘If you hang around with Jeff and the likes of him, for sure, you will come up smelling like a rose like is my own experience! Ha! Ha! HalleluYah! Hope to hear from you soon! 🙂
His love in my heart for all!
Chandra
Although you’ve used different wording, I believe this to be true. The saying – you will go as far as the people you surround yourself with – is what I’m used to hearing. And I use this as my reason every year to clean up my contacts/friends. The thing is I have never equated that to my income. Great blog!
Thank you
Stephen Paz
Great coaches like you just keep reinforcing, repeating, updating, and redelivering the basics, the essentials, the principles of life. You do it in such a genuine and heart-felt way that I always enjoy your message. While human nature doesn’t change our understanding of it fades. The ‘truth’ never gets old and neither does caring about the success of others.
Patrick Bunn
I completely agree that the company we keep can directly and indirectly affect how successful we are, in our business, in our personal lives, and every other aspect of our lives. The question is how; How do we upgrade? How is it that we can make those connections and develop those relationships? Likely, until we have proven ourselves, those who are highly successful don’t really have the time or desire to invest in us “no-names” or “small players”. Why bring their average down by adding us to their circle?
Granted, John Maxwell teaches something very similar, but not everyone is compassionate and willing to invest in others. And I’m definitely not wanting to burden anyone else just so I can increase my success.
Harry Che
If this is true, then we could only become the average of whoever we be friends with, and no matter how successful those friends are, we are still average among them. So we end up only just an average.
Martina Wing
Great energy and message, Jeff! Thanks
Pamela Alexander
This is what happens in real life. I’ve seen it time and time again, but I must say it was wonderful to hear it so well articulated. You’ve explained in clear terms how what we do affects how we think and visa versa. This is where the rubber hits the road. Keep it coming.
John Golitz
Hmmm Not sure I agree. I believe in attraction and not exclusion. I am in the healing business, so I hang out with all kinds -some extremely wealthy and successful others are the grooms of the wealthy making $500 per week. I like them all and treat them all the same. I totally agree in your comment about being present with each person we are with (oh wait I have a text…)
I really like hanging out with my dogs and horses and they don’t make a penny! What does that say about me?
Before I saw your post, I was reflecting on how much I was enjoying your added comments about self improvement. It is a nice bonus! I love being around authentic people that are following their passion, what ever that happens to be. Being in harmony with all kinds of people raises my vibration and that, I believe, ultimately raises my flow of abundance.
TIna
Love this. I really believe this is true. To really affect your live you have to have a presence in the life of others. To do that you have to be venerable. That is a hard thing for all of us I think, I know it is for me. SO that is what I am working for now. TO allow myself to be venerable, to allow my true self to be out there. Thanks Jeff, You’re awesome.
Teresa
Hello Jeff!
This might a dumb question but how do we determine who we hang out with? You see, I am working non-stop and when I am not I am with my kids/family. Is this what it is referring to? Would my kids and family be considered the people I hang out with most? My husband and I have an entertainment business so we meet all kinds of people, but it is all ‘on duty’. It is hard to mix business and pleasure in this line of work (even though this work is almost all pleasure), I feel like we have no one just to hang out with, spend time with, go out for coffee. Mostly we spend vacations with our relatives (once a year), a friend that lives abroad (a couple of times a year), and then all the people in cyber space (would these count as hanging out with?).
Now, I am looking into ways of changing this, but it is so tough to go up to someone and say “Can you be my friend?”
Any tips? Advice?
Thanks
Lykke
Thank you for this reminder to keep movimg forward .The people you hang out with can either stop you or inspire you to go for your dreams. No matter how good the relationship is, it will always be put to the test when you decide to move one inch above the “normal” way of Living and conducting yourself . Interesting, a bit sad-but often true. Have a great day. Lykke R.
Tom Murphy
Jeff,
Thought provoking. I agree with the analysis and would simple add, you can upgrade yourself by helping to upgrade your friends. Find the value each person brings and contribute to their growth. Think of it more as a team sport. You can either change teams or make your team better.
Tom
Jeffrey
Dear Occupant …. No, it’s … Hi Jeff,
What are the odds of hearing a similar message twice in the same daylll The idea of upgrading yourself is promoted in a blog by Tai Lopez in regards to finding a Mentor. Mentor’s want to see what you have to offer, what you bring to the table before they spend any time. When you have a lot of choice and not alot of time, how do you parse through whomever wants to take up your time. So the advice was to not be a jack of all trades, but have at least one subject you can talk about. It helps if you have a subject that your are curious about, and know about more than the other people. Especially when the subject is interesting to the other person. So upgrading yourself can help you in business, but also in your social life.
Diane
I find this concept interesting… Three years ago, I did a triathlon during the summer and found that my swimming needed some upgrade, so I joined a competitive swimming team in order to receive some coaching and improve my swimming. Well, the quality of people I met and became friends with has been really amazing! Some of them are olympic athletes who are older and still love the sport, some others have simply chosen swimming because it is easier on the joints than other sports but have been swimming for some 10 or 20 years and have become really good at it. So not only I have upgraded my swimming skills but I have also upgraded the quality of friends and relationships I have, doctors, entrepreneurs, self-employed individuals who are very successful, enjoy winning and are willing to train hard for it!
Lisa Grunden
I like the extra level you bumped this to. Most of us have heard that we have traits like those we hang out with. In the entrepreneurial world – it’s not just about money. It’s about LIFE. It’s everything. The best piece of advice, keep your friends. Make new ones – Be present. Be magnetic. Great content.
Belle
Hey Jeff,
I love this. It reminds me of one of my fave books, the go giver (have you read it?). I love that you talk about areas other than money in upgrading your life.
Love it!
Belle
Charles
Hello Jeff. I write not for myself ( I am 83 years old) but for my wonderful 28 year old grandson who greatly needs help in the area of self confidence and polite assertiveness. He has a degree in Business and at the moment has no definite direction in his life. I would welcome any advice for him. I wish I had your input for myself many years ago. Bless you for what you do.
Oana
Jeff, you inspire me so much!
Shari
This makes sense! Thanks for the words of inspiration. I’m going to go out and take action!
Joanna
Jeff, you inspire us. Thank you!
\O/
Tom Osika
This is another great message! I think a whole book with your view and approach on this- the ways and principles of living and being to enrich and expand our lives would be fantastic. I say this because though a lot of people speak and write about these things.. your particular way of expressing and teaching these principles is really effective in my view.
Marcello Vieira
Realy sweet, Jeff, very personal. The opposite of hypey, which is refreshing.
Margaret Fryer
Dear Jeff,
You are definitely an amazing person. You come across as incredibly knowledgable but humble at the same time, promising believable rewards.
In fact, kindness and being in the moment and listening intently are aspects of Mindfulness. People who are practice Mindfulness grow to be kinder and more grateful. The US has taken on Mindfulness quite heartily, the UK not so much yet. And, yes, it is possible to be mindful and be a successful entrepreneur.
Tracy
Peter
I love this, Jeff. A ‘mature’ commentary on upgrading yourself but, as you say, certainly not out of date, and never will be. Over the last few years I’ve socialised increasingly with people who have that generosity and kindness which make them stand out from the crowd. Most of my socialising has been online, but I’ve still noticed myself having more and more to give as I absorb that upgrading influence of so many really wonderful people.
And you’re one of them! I don’t yet have telephone conversations with you or meet you at seminars, but those are among the things I aspire to. Thank you for your persistence in making your presence felt through these videos ancient and modern! :’)
Speak to you soon!
Peter
Michael
Hi Jeff, that sounds so right. I have quite a few people around me now that perpetually drain my battery… But at the same time, I mean, it’s not that I don’t like (most) of them. I see their problems, I do care. I have my issues as well, I must admit, but I tackle them, one at the time. They don’t, and I can’t rescue them. Difficult. I have very great people around me as well, so, it”s all good, I guess. But it’s been like this ever since. When I was very young, I wanted to be a jazz musician. I was located in a small town in Germany and I took all my heart (and some money…) to go to New York and study. Now everyone said to me “no one is waiting for YOU in NYC” – which of course was true. But that wasn’t what I expected anyways. I just wanted to be among likeminded people, preferably the best in that area. And so it was. These where two of the best years in my life. Made great progress (and yes, guys at home: I had my first gig in NY on day 3 and many more thereafter).
Thanks Jeff for sharing your stuff!
Tracy
Upgrade in progress. 🙂 Turns out, I have made lots and lots of new friends recently. I have been peeking in on you and your most of your fellows in your webinars and videos. I consider all of you my imaginary friends. Your ears must ring constantly. Guess that means I will be worth bookoo, shortly.
Frankly, I enjoy the lessons so much, I consider them true wealth.
Thank You for the valuable information and inspiration.
Peter Leckemby
The power of association is huge. I’ve found great people at conferences also. My business partner and I met on a hotel shuttle at a conference. I am looking so forward to PLF Live 2018!!
And a great way to connect is to serve others when you meet them. Finding ways to add instant value is powerful.
Rose
Being present in the moment. I have a Friend who would not even think of not being present when we converse. Being like Him is my life’s goal.
“He who walks with wise men [and women] will be wise. . . ” Prov 13:20
Laurie
Jeff, thank you for sharing in this honest and immense wisdom. The truth is mightily powerful, indeed. Having said that, hey, lessons of greatest value might sting a little. Yet if not well-managed, the ego can fool us right into failure. Speaking only from the vantage points of age and experience, I humbly submit that Jeff’s is very wise advice, and if left ignored, improvement in one’s life, professional, and even personal, likely will be minimal – it’s that important! Besides, it’s never too late to reach up, learn a little something, grow and improve.
Debbie Boggs
Great hearing that from you Jeff and I’m glad to know you’re an introvert :)…actually I’ve heard something similar to your talk today, which is you become who you surround yourself with. I feel that has allot to do with mindset as well…I mean, if your surround yourself with negative people then you’ll become negative as well.
I like the term you use – upgrade – and I’ve not heard it explained, as you did, about providing value to others…that was interesting! Thanks for your positive impact :)…
Iks
Your smile speaks to me of your gratitude.
Keep Inspiring Jeff! Cheers!
Jeanne Paglio
Great words of wisdom, Jeff. Very true and uplifting, as well. Thanks.
Bonnie Miller
Point taken. Something I think about. I would add that I am allowing my new self or the person I want to become, be attracted to those people whom I see on that path but just further ahead. I heard Tony Robbins tsk about this. I am finding it is not as easy during this pandemic but I have joined a lot of different groups for this purpose and I know it is having an affect. I would also add that these are people who invested in themselves and as I start to invest in myself more and more, I am seeing those results. Thanks, Jeff.
Amanda van der Gulik
I totally agree with you Jeff, we are the sum of the people we surround ourselves with, financially, emotionally, spiritually, physically.
The problem a lot of people are facing right now with the coronavirus and social distancing is that they are being forced to stay close to the people who they love but are not necessarily the people who will help them grow to be the best version of themselves.
So how can we work on building our empowering group to surround ourselves with?
My suggestion, and what I do for myself, is first to sign up for the virtual live events, like your PLF Live for example, where we get to have break out sessions in the zoom virtual event to make new connections that will raise who we are and what we wish to become.
Another way is to actively search out Facebook and YouTube groups and mentors, like you Jeff, who inspire, motivate and keep us on track to becoming our best selves.
And removing following those who bring us down or keep us focused on our problems and obstacles and really making sure we only pay attention to those who will help us grow.
Love and hugs Jeff (safe virtual ones of course) thank-you for always giving us the best of yourself and being one of our circle to surround ourselves with to elevate our own sum of who we are!
Cheers … Amanda … Excited Life Enthusiast! ;o)
Carol Willey
Thank you! Reminds me that this can tie into the JV Launch as well.
Becca Brueck
Personal growth is the hardest and yet most rewarding thing we can do for ourselves. I am looking forward to using the information here to help me be more authentic and push my growth to the max.
S. Al-Ani
Thank you, Jeff! I already knew this special proposal before, but how you suggest it, this was very touching! And how you explain to stay with older friends, too – but also get to new amazing people, this was wonderful – appreciate very much!! :-))
Margie Mckellow
Love your enthusiasm Jeff. Would love to be in your circle of friends! Have a great day.
Arthurine
My Mom has always said, “Show me your company, tell me who you are.” It was her way of letting me know that I would be judged by the company I keep, so I should always make sure to be in the company of people that you would be proud to be associated with or proud to have represent who you are. I’ve followed this advice always, but I think Jeff’s upgrade yourself advice takes Mom’s advice to a new level. There is nothing wrong with connecting with people who you can learn from and as a result take yourself to a whole new level. I’ll always have the best friends that I’ve had since I was ages 6, 14, and 17 but maybe I will then become their upgrade themselves friend.
Carlos Motta
Perfect. Clear as always.
add people with value.
give examples to everyone.
Gayle
I like you Jeff you are very generous and giving and sincere person but I’m at odds with this. I am not the people, associated around me. Scratch the surface and they are all very fickle, insincere people who prob believe this. They only associate because they think you give them some sort of credibility. They all ran when life went wrong for our son (just turned out to be ADHD and couldn’t cope with school) so a life event twisted this on its head for us. Seemingly nice people just ALL ditched and ran. So where does that leave us trying to build a business bigger and better, well we are not those people associates. Life is rosey when you look like your doing well, people will gather. It’s all rather superficial. It’s a superficial model. Prob helps a lot yeah, nepotism of the rich also get people up the ladder quick. Superficial though and not what everyone can rely on. And just makes me feel down really and like this is never going to happen then. Just being honest. This is an entitled way of thinking for many.
Om
Love this Jeff vibration is everything vibe with the right tribe and be present. Very powerful video.